The Adventures of Sez

My Favourite Essay This Semester

2010-05-25T22:44:00.002+10:00

Have been taking this great class this semester and got all excited. Have just finished an essay about the Norther Territory Intervention and thought I would share my thoughts with the world. The more of us who know and care about it the better. Lets get the word out there, and then lets get something done to stop it!

“When I heard about the intervention ... I felt like someone had declared war on me again
– on me and on my people.” Reverend Ray Minniecon, 13 February, 2010

Implications of the Social Determinants of Health model on the Northern Territory
Emergency Response

This paper will discuss the social determinants of health model in relation to the Northern Territory Emergency Response (NTER). Marmot’s model will be outlined followed by a brief introduction to the inequality that exists between Indigenous and non-Indigenous Australians. The historical interactions between the two cultures will be outlined to provide an understanding of the motivations behind the NTER. Four areas of the intervention will be discussed including details of the problems and how the government attempted to address them. Aspects of governmental policy which work against the social determinants of health model will be highlighted and suggestions will be made as to how the model could be used to overcome the problems and work to eliminate inequality.

Evidence for the social determinants of health model was first shown in the Whitehall study, a seven year longitudinal observation of 17 530 British Civil Servants (Marmot, Rose, Shirley & Hamilton, 1978). Marmot and his colleagues noted that civil servants high on the organisational hierarchy were less likely to suffer from coronary heart disease than those below them. The level of employment was a stronger predictor of risk of coronary heart disease than conventional factors including smoking, cholesterol levels, leisure-time physical activity, blood pressure and obesity. There was something about the employment gradient that was putting individuals at the bottom of the organisational heap at greater risk of heart disease.

It may appear reasonable that poverty is related to low health outcomes with poorer individuals having limited access to water, food and medical care. However, as demonstrated in the Whitehall study, when access to basic needs is relatively constant the effect of the social gradient is still evident (Marmot, Rose, Shirley & Hamilton, 1978). The effect holds across the developed world where access to water and medical care does not fully explain what Marmot refers to as the status syndrome (Marmot, 2006). Marmot suggests that other needs of those on the lower end of social hierarchies are not being met – the needs for autonomy and full participation in society. When these needs are left unmet, metabolic and endocrine changes can lead to increased risk of disease. Low social position and the subsequent limitation of social participation and autonomy has been linked to biological stress pathways (Marmot).

While biological factors point to chronic activation of stress responses as one of the mechanisms of the social gradient’s affect on health, it is important to understand what it is about the lower end of social hierarchies that causes stress. In his paper published in 2006, Marmot suggests that receipt of social support and participation in social networks are related to increased disease rates and mortality. Marmot sums up his argument succinctly stating “Deprived of a clean, safe neighbourhood, meaningful work, opportunities for quality children’s education, freedom from police harassment and arrest, and freedom from violence and aggression, it is harder to have control over one’s life or be a full social participant” (Marmot, 2006 p. 1305). Well-being and social health are determined, in part, by an individual’s ability to fully participate in social decision-making and exercise a level of self-determination (AIDA, 2010). The relative degree of autonomy and opportunities for social engagement underlie the social gradient’s effect on health (Marmot, 2006).

The differences in health and mortality rates between Aboriginal and non-Indigenous Australians are stark examples of the status syndrome. The average life expectancy of Aboriginal men is 59 years, compared with 77 for non-Indigenous males (Australian Institute of Health and Welfare, 2006). Aboriginal Australians are three times more likely to suffer from heart attacks or strokes compared to other Australians and are 50% more likely to die from it (Indigenous Disadvantage, 2008). Material deprivation alone cannot account for these differences; Aboriginal Australians are a socially excluded minority (Marmot, 2005). To understand the etiological factors which led to the problems the NTER aimed to address requires an understanding of the interaction between Aboriginal and non-Indigenous people since white settlement.

The exact population of Aboriginal people before colonisation in 1788 is not know, however it is estimated that by 1900 at least six out of seven Aboriginal people were killed or had died as the result of introduced diseases (Muirhead, n.d.). By 1911 all states in Australia had introduced legislation which gave the government the responsibility of ‘protecting’ Aboriginal people. This delegation gave the government control over Aboriginal people, with the right to restrict employment, force movement onto stations, as well as forcibly remove children from their families. Children were taken from their families until 1969 (ReconciliAction Network, 2007). Exact numbers are not known, but it is estimated that 6,200 children were stolen between 1883 and 1969 in New South Wales alone (Read, 2007). While stations and reserves were designed to prepare Aboriginal people for assimilation into white society, in reality they restricted freedom of movement and access to education, proper nutrition and health care (Banari, n.d.). These policies lead to the separation of many families (Banari, n.d.) and “laid the foundation for generational exclusion from mainstream society” (AIDA, 2010, p.7). As evidenced in this brief synopsis, the government has restricted autonomy of Aboriginal people since colonisation.

While the last 20 years have seen many changes in government policy, it appears full participation in society has not yet been achieved for Aboriginal people, whether that society is based on western or Aboriginal culture. The differences between Aboriginal and mainstream cultures is difficult to understate. The Aboriginal worldview is one of interconnectedness (AIDA, 2010), based around the “four pillars of traditional society: belief system, spirituality, land and family” (Randall, 2007 p.5). Many government policies have failed to understand this worldview and resulted in feelings of alienation and collective despair (O’Loughlin, 2008).

The Little Children Are Sacred report released on 15th June 2007 highlighted the problem of abuse and neglect of children in Aboriginal communities in the Northern Territory (NT) (Wild & Anderson, 2007). The report suggested the problem was caused in part because of the breakdown in Aboriginal society and culture. On the 21st of June, 2007 Aboriginal Australians were subjected to an intervention as the government declared the situation of child abuse in Aboriginal communities in the NT a ‘national emergency’ (Altman, 2007). What followed was the NTER which saw 600 soldiers from the Australian Defence Force sent into Aboriginal communities without consultation or even warning. In his speech at a rally coordinated by the Stop the Intervention Collective Sydney in February 2010, Reverend Ray Minniecon, a descendant of the Kabi Kabi people of South-East Queensland commented “When I heard about the intervention ... I felt like someone had declared war on me again – on me and on my people.”

The life span, health and mortality gap between Indigenous and non-Indigenous Australians existed long before the intervention was announced. However, many of the policies rolled out as part of the NTER continue to threaten the autonomy and social integration of Aboriginal people.
The NTER adopted only two of the 97 recommendations made in the Little Children Are Sacred report, instead focusing on land, income management, pornography and alcohol control and health (Hinkson, 2008). In its health impact assessment of the NTER the Australian Indigenous Doctors Association (AIDA) noted that the method of introduction, and continued running of the response was likely to contribute to the trauma and disease experienced by Aboriginal people (AIDA, 2010). The NTER overlooked the central importance of dignity to health (Durie, 2008). The government’s actions in each of these four areas have perpetuated the restriction of autonomy and exclusion from society experienced by Aboriginal people.

Land is central to Aboriginal well-being (Swan & Raphael, 1995). As one of the four pillars of traditional society, land (and an individuals’ connection to it) is of central importance to Aboriginal people (Randall, 2007). In the 1960’s the Australian government began returning land to traditional owners (ReconciliAction, 2007) however without control of the land the government has been hesitant to invest in housing and infrastructure (AIDA, 2010). This has contributed to what the Little Children Are Sacred report called a “disastrous and desperate” (Wild & Anderson, 2007 p.195) housing situation with many homes overcrowded and poorly maintained. The NTER aimed to address this problem by instating the NTER Act which applies to more than 500 Aboriginal communities and covers more than 600,000 square km – almost half of the NT (Ting, 2009). Under the act the government has compulsorily acquired five year leases over 64 areas of Aboriginal land. While the underlying freehold title remains unaffected, the government has control to use the land for any purpose consistent with the Act’s objectives (Ting). For areas not compulsorily acquired the government made the provision of funding for new housing conditional upon the signing of forty-year leases (Wiseman, 2009) under which the government would then release the $1.7 billion allocated to remote housing in the NT (Stop the NT Intervention, n.d.).

After lengthy negotiations which began in March 2007 the federal Minister for Aboriginal Affairs Jenny Macklin announced in May 2009 that she would enforce permanent acquisition of Aboriginal land (Toohey, 2009). Repeated attempts to broker a deal between the federal government and the Tangentyere Council (representing 15 of the 18 town camps) were slow and tedious. One of the main points of contention was who would manage the housing (Donald, 2009). The commonwealth insisted that Territory Housing control the housing assets while the Tangentyere wanted the Central Australian Affordable Housing Company (a company it has created – with government funding), to manage the housing (Toohey). Yananymul Mununggurr, Chief Executive of the Laynhapuy Homelands Associations said “Indigenous people are being asked to give up the basis of their culture and social organisation, and their only economic asset, in return for assistance that any other Australian citizen with the same socioeconomic status would be entitled to” (Ting, 2009).

As this debate between the Australian Federal Government and the Tangentyere Council highlights, the issue is one of control. Full participation in society and autonomy includes a sense of security about living arrangements and permanency of residence. This is Aboriginal land. Through the restriction of funding the government has again taken control and are dictating where Aboriginal people can and cannot live. The actions and policies of the intervention have worked to restrict the autonomy and further segregate Aboriginal people from mainstream society as they are not given the same rights as other Australians. As outlined in the social determinants of health model, this may see the health of Aboriginal people further deteriorate.
Were future governmental policies based on the Marmot’s model they could more successfully tackle the current housing crisis. Through consultation with Aboriginal communities the government could address their need for autonomy and social participation. Instead of hiring contractors who fly in and out of the communities to build houses, training facilities, apprenticeships and continued employment could all be facilitated through a new housing scheme. However, a scheme developed by the government and imposed on Aboriginal communities would not be appropriate. This scheme would need to be planned, initiated, run and supported by community members.

Based on 2006 census data up to 7,500 children in the NT aged three to 17 are likely to be missing out on schooling. The NTER aimed to use income management to increase participation in training and education and to ensure that government payments were being spent on priority needs (Department of Families, Housing, Community Services and Indigenous Affairs [FaHCSIA], 2009). The FaHCSIA minister at the time, Mal Brough claimed income management would “extend the principal of mutual obligation beyond participation in the workforce to a range of behaviours that address, either directly or indirectly, the welfare and development of children” (Brough, 2007). Mutual obligation refers to the idea that community members should give something back to society for their welfare payments. However, the scheme was introduced only in the NT, and only applied to Indigenous people. The inequity in this policy is unmistakeable.

The compulsory management of government payments was potentially one of the most controversial elements of the NTER. Income management covers all welfare benefits and applies to all members living in prescribed communities selected by the government, including over 70% of the Aboriginal people living in the NT (FaHCSIA, 2009). Fifty percent of income and 100% of lump sum payments are managed by Centrelink. The government can deduct funds to cover meals children receive at school (Behrendt & McCausland, 2008) while the remaining managed income is directed into an account linked to a BasicsCard which can then be used to purchase food, medicine, clothes, electricity and other essential household items. The BasicsCard can only be used at certain stores, which often require holders to queue at separate registers resulting in what Lauren Mellor from the Intervention Rollback Action Group called an “apartheid-like situation” with Aboriginal people on one side of the store and the rest of the community on the other (Coady, 2010).

The rushed implementation of the program and the limited consultation with communities left many outraged (Quixley, 2010). Under the guise of ‘protecting’ or ‘helping’ Aboriginal people, the government restricted the autonomy of communities and placed another barrier between Aboriginal people and their full participation in society. While this policy was intended to help close the gap in health standards, it may only serve to increase it. Income management, in the form implemented by the NTER, may not be the answer to the low school participation rates in the NT. On the other hand, perhaps policy makers were not asking the right questions.

Application of the social determinants of health model to the problem of school attendance may be highly beneficial. The first priority would be to identify the underlying causes of non-attendance. Consultation with Aboriginal communities may reveal a hesitation to send children to mainstream schools where language and cultural barriers have not been addressed. Cultural safety is a matter of priority (Wood & Schwass, 1993). Over 40% of school age children in the NT are Indigenous, however only seven Indigenous principals are employed by the government in this region (AIDA, 2010). While employment of Indigenous staff does not ensure cultural safety, it may be a step toward increasing participation of community members in decision making. This participation in society would see one of the basic needs of the community being met and would be likely to result in better health outcomes for Aboriginal communities.

Alcohol and substance abuse were identified as significant problems in the Little Children are Sacred Report. Health concerns included foetal alcohol syndrome, violence, and increased vulnerability to sexual abuse (Wild & Anderson, 2007). In an attempt to resolve these issues the NTER introduced blanket bans on alcohol and pornography in some Aboriginal communities. This included the placement of signs at community entrances announcing the bans. One Aboriginal community member commented “Like them big signs they put up there. It is as though they thought all black fellas are alcoholics and paedophiles” (AIDA, 2010). The restriction of alcohol in Aboriginal communities was seen as racist and discriminatory. Alcohol misuse is not just an Aboriginal problem. The placement of signs outside of Aboriginal communities reinforced the divide between Aboriginal and non-Indigenous communities, further excluding Aboriginal people from full participation in society.

The rushed implementation of the NTER did not allow corroboration with existing programs. Recognising the problems being perpetuated by alcohol abuse over 100 Indigenous communities in the NT had voluntarily become ‘dry’ before the intervention (Racing, Gaming and Licensing Northern Territory, 2006). Had the intervention been based on the social determinants of health model, existing initiatives such as dry communities would have been embraced and encouraged. Exploration of what had allowed these communities to make this decision could encourage other communities to make the decision themselves. Importantly, this would need to be a decision made by the community, rather than a governmental mandate to be obeyed.

Aboriginal health and well-being has severely decreased since colonisation (Muirhead, n.d.). Indigenous people are twice as likely to have a profound disability and 36% aged 15 years and older reported a long-term health condition or disability (Indigenous Disadvantage, 2008). The Little Children Are Sacred Report identified better health care as a priority need in Aboriginal communities (Wild & Anderson, 2007). In response the NTER targeted the following health areas; extra drug and alcohol rehabilitation and treatment services, health checks and follow-up treatment for children and specialist support for children who have been abused. The total budget committed is $1.3 billion including $100 million over 2 years from the 2008–2009 financial year for more doctors, nurses, allied health professionals and specialist services (Glasson, 2007). While funding is needed, the intervention may not be the best vessel through which it could be delivered. The Little Children Are Sacred Report did not recommend individual health checks (Wild & Anderson, 2007), however the government initially considered forensic examinations of all Aboriginal children to establish abuse levels which lead to “widespread fear” in Aboriginal communities (Boffa, Bell, Davies, Paterson & Cooper, 2007, p.617). The government later announced that health checks would be voluntary and would assess holistic health levels – but according to Boffa and his colleagues the damage had already been done.

The AIDA health impact assessment of the NTER raised serious concerns about the future well-being of Indigenous children and families under the intervention (AIDA, 2010). The report assessed potential health impacts of the NTER on all aspects of Indigenous health and wellbeing, not just physical health. The report found the intervention would potentially lead to ‘profound’ long-term damage and any potential physical health benefits were largely outweighed by negative impacts to wellbeing, psychological and social health as well as cultural integrity (AIDA, 2010). In-depth consultation with Aboriginal communities is needed to ensure the true needs of the community are identified and addressed. An article written by the College of Nursing in 2007 highlighted many problems with the implementation of the NTER, citing examples of the intervention being rolled out over the top of existing programs without responding to requests from these existing organisations to be involved (Gaea, 2007). Improvement in Aboriginal health will require participation from Aboriginal community members who should be given control over decision making processes.

The social determinants of health model suggests that health limited autonomy and participation are detrimental to health (Marmot, 2006). The suggestions for policy changes to the NTER outlined above all include recommendations for full consultation with Aboriginal communities and the return of control around decision making processes to the community. This may be no easy feat. As outlined previously the history of interactions between Aboriginal people and Australian government had been strained (to say the least). Corroboration with communities to resolve the profound issues discussed above will require open, honest and respectful conversation. While the government has shown moves towards rebuilding relationships with communities, interventions such as the NTER have worked to further push these two groups away from this type of conversation. Policy makers should not only recognise the mistakes of the past, but should work to never allow them to occur again. This may only be achieved with understanding of Aboriginal culture, a commitment to cultural safety, and an appreciation for the benefits of health models such as Marmot’s.

As evidenced in the governmental policies of the NTER little acknowledgement was given to the social determinants of health model. Policies around land, income management, alcohol and pornography bans and health have been implemented without consultation with communities and are laden paternalistic undertones. While the NTER aimed to improve the situation in the NT, overlooking the basic needs of autonomy and full social participation the intervention may sadly prove detrimental to the situation it was trying to help. Previous policies have not been effective. The time for a new approach has come.

References
Altman, J.C. (2007). The Howard government’s Northern Territory intervention: Are neo- paternalism and Indigenous development compatible? Centre for Aboriginal Economic Policy Research, 16, 2-19.
Australian Institute of Health and Welfare, 2006. National summary of the 2003 and 2004 jurisdictional reports against the Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander health performance indicators. Canberra, Australian Capital Territory: Australian Institute of Health and Welfare.
Australian Indigenous Doctors Association and Centre Health Equity Training, Research and Evaluation, (2010). Health impact assessment of the Northern Territory emergency response. Sydney, New South Wales: University of New South Wales.
Banari, (n.d.) Government policy in relation to Aboriginal people. Retrieved May 7, 2010 from
Banari Indigenous History of Sydney web site: http://www.cityofsydney.nsw.gov.au/
barani/themes/theme3.htm
Behrendt L., & McCausland, R. (2008) Welfare Payments and School Attendance: an analysis of experimental policy in Indigenous education: an issues paper [prepared] for the Australian Education Union by the Jumbunna Indigenous House of Learning, University of Technology Sydney. Southbank, Victoria.
Boffa, J.D., Bell, A.I., Davies, T.E., Paterson, J. & Cooper, D.E., (2007). The Aboriginal Medical Services Alliance Northern Territory: Engaging with the intervention to improve primary health care. The Medical Journal of Australia, 187, 617-618.
Brough, M. (2007) Second reading speech, Social Security and Other Legislation Amendment (Welfare Payment Reform) Bill 2007, House of Representatives, 7 August 2007, p. 7.
Coady, D. (2010, February 15). Shopping with BasicsCard like apartheid. ABC News. Retrieved from ABC News web site: http://www.abc.net.au/news/stories/2010/02/15/2820290.htm
Department of Families, Housing, Community Services and Indigenous Affairs, (2009). The evaluation of income management in the Northern Territory. Retrieved from the FaHCSIA web site: http://www.fahcsia.gov.au/sa/indigenous/pubs/nter_reports/Documents
/nt_eval_rpt/1_backgrounb.htm
Donald, D. (2009). Resolution on lease negotiations close. Retrieved on May 10, from Tangentyere Council Incorporated web site: http://www.tangentyere.org.au/publications/documents/ TangentyereLeaseNegn.pdf
Durie, M. (2008). The Wunderly Oration 2007. Indigenous responses to health and disease: principles, goals and pathways. Internal Medicine Journal, 38: 368373.
Glasson, W.J.H. (2007). The Northern Territory emergency response: A chance to heal Australia’s worst sore. The Medical Journal of Australia, 187, 614-616.
Healy, J. (Eds.). (2008). Indigenous Disadvantage, Issues in Society: 271, Balmain, New South Wales: The Spinner Press.
Hinkson, J. (2008). After the Intervention, Arena Journal, 29/30, 3-9.
Jordan, L. (2009). Northern Territory intervention “walk off”. Retrieved from Amnesty International Australia web site: http://www.amnesty.org.au/poverty/comments/22250/
Minniecon, R. (2010). Stop the NT intervention - Sorry means you won’t do it again. Sydney, New South Wales: Stop the Intervention Collective Sydney.
Marmot, M.G., Rose, G., Shipley, M., & Hamilton, P.J.S. (1978). Employment grade and coronary heart disease in British civil servants. Journal of Epidemiology and Community Health, 32, 244-249.
Marmot, M.G. (2006). Status syndrome: a challenge to medicine. Journal of the American Medical Association, 295, 1304-1307.
Marmot, M.G. (2005). Social determinants of health inequalities. Lancet, 365, 1099-1104.
Muirhead, T. (n.d.). Timeline. Retrieved May 9, 2010, from Share Our Pride web site: http://www.shareourpride.org.au/pages/topics/our-shared-history/timeline.php
O’Loughlin, M. (2008). Radical hope, or death by a thousand cuts? The future for Indigenous Australians. Arena Journal, 29/30 p. 175-201.
Quixley, S. (2009). The realities of income management: A summary. Retrieved May 4, from Community Services Consultancy web site: http://www.suziqconsulting.com.au/
intervention_ongoing_files/If%20the%20Intervention%20came%20to%20Your%20Suburb%20-%20Feb10.pdf
Racing Gaming and Licensing Northern Territory (2006) Restricted areas. Retrieved May 9, 2010, from Northern Territory Government Australia web site: http://www.nt.gov.au.ntt/ licensing/liquor.html
Randall, B. (2007). Bob Randall: KANYINI directed by Melanie Hogan.
ReconciliAction Network, (2007). Stolen generations fact sheet. Retrieved May 7, 2010 from ReconciliAction Networknsw web site: http://reconciliaction.org.au/nsw/education- kit/stolen-generations.
Read, P. (2007). The stolen generations: The removal of Aboriginal children in New South Wales 1883 to 1969. National Centre for Indigenous Studies. Australian National University.
Stop the NT Intervention, (n.d.). Facts and Info. Retrieved May 7, 2010 from Stop the NT Intervention web site: http://stoptheintervention.org/facts.
Swan, P. & Raphael, B., (1995). Ways Forward: The National Consultancy Report on Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander Mental Health. Canberra: Australian Government Publishing Service.
Ting, I. (2009). Inside the intervention: Is land control at the heart of the intervention? Position Magazine, 101, 5-6.
Toohey, P. (2009, May 25). Macklin lays down the law on town camp seizures. The Australian, Retrieved May 7 from The Australian web site: http://www.theaustralian.com.au/news/macklin-lays-down-law-on-town-camp-seizures/story-e6frg6n6-1225715459771
Wild, R., & Anderson, P. (2007). Ampe Akelyernemane Meke Mekarle, Little Children Are Sacred. Report of the Northern Territory Board of Inquiry into the Protection of Aboriginal Children from Sexual Abuse. Darwin, Northern Territory: Northern Territory Board of Inquiry.
Wiseman, M. (2009). The Façade of Indigenous Rights as Rudd’s Racism Devastates. Retrieved May 15 from Stop the Intervention web site: http://stoptheintervention.org/facts/press- releases/mr-on-rudd-s-support-for-un-declaration-3-4-09
Wood, P. J. & Schwass, M. (1993). Cultural safety: A framework for changing attitudes. Nursing Praxis in New Zealand, 8, 4 – 15.

Therapy

2009-02-02T17:41:00.003+10:00

I just started reading this great book today. It's called Passionate Marriage by David Schnarch. It's tag line reads "Keeping love and intimacy alive in committed relationships"
Given that I'm a bit of a professional single, it is proving itself to be a very interesting read. But, as with all things, any understanding gained is a stone in the path to compassion. For how can we empathise with others if we cannot comprehend their experience?

I came across this great paragraph in the book:
When we talk about developing a fuller, deeper understanding of marriage, many people automatically think of unconscious feelings of repressed experiences. We've grown accustomed to looking at life's struggles as a reflection of unconscious processes. When we're unhappy, we look within ourselves for past traumas that incapacitate us in the present. The notion of uncovering repressed feelings has become synonymous with mental health, as if progressively stripping away facades and unearthing unconscious anxieties will liberate our innate vitality and creativity. In this view, therapy is a method of peeling away the layers of your character like an onion. Often, however, the problem is not a matter of peeling away layers but of developing them - growing ourselves up to be mature and resourceful adults who can solve our current problems.

How's that for food for thought? How long have I spent trying to understand and uncover the causes for my reactions, prejudices, beliefs and behaviours. Naval gazing. What really is it that I expect to find inside my onion? Surely by now I would have realised that inside all the layers there is no substance, just more layers. What a relief to stop peeling and start healing. There are attitudes and behaviours which form my character that I am not proud of. Interrogating the root causes of them will not instigate change.

What we need is hope. We need encouragement. We need strategies. The past holds an important place in our journeys, but it does not hold the answers. If it did, we would have found them last time we went around this mountain. People can change, mature and grow. What we need is an arm around our shoulders and a friendly point in the right direction.

Jung said that successful therapy by definition involves the meeting, interaction, and communication of two personalities. Unless the therapist brings his own personality to the fore there can be no true exchange. Two personalities, two souls, on equal ground, both alike in dignity.

I have no more answers than anyone else, yet I will one day be the one sitting behind the desk. I am no onion peeler. I do not intend to rip people bare.
What is it that I propose to offer? I will offer all that I can. Hope. Love. Compassion. Understanding. A listening ear. No answers. Just a bit of light into dark situations. Is this even possible? Does this type of therapy exist? Is it even therapy at all or is it just friendship? An art which is sorely missed in our times.

Why would you throw yourself out of a perfectly functioning airplane

2009-02-02T17:25:00.010+10:00

I've had a lot of people ask me that question of late. And to be honest, there just isn't an answer that feels sufficient. At the moment I'm sticking with 'coz it was really fun' or 'coz I wanted to give it a go'. While these responses are accurate, they are not the best life motto's to live by, so I hesitate from quoting them. In any case, it was amazing fun, and I have always wanted to go skydiving. I've put some of the photos below. I think these may be some of the best hairdos I'll ever produce :-)

$200

2008-11-06T16:50:00.002+10:00

It's raining in Brisbane at the moment. I watched the water slosh from side to side with each corner I turned on the way to work this morning. Full puddle this time. Looks like the Maccas cup is going to have to become a permanent safety feature again, don't want the passengers drowning now do we?

My good friend Mikey brought a car two weeks ago. Same model as mine, only better. His is 6 years younger, has power steering, air conditioning, 4 doors, no leaks, and the locks actually work. He paid $200 for that car. $200! What does that make mine worth? $40? I bought a dress on the weekend that only cost that much! Surely a car is worth more? Isn't it?

To top it all off one of my tires has decided to go flat a bit. I've had to allow an extra 5 mins to my commute so I can stop at the petrol station and put more air in it. If my car is only worth $40 surely it's not worth paying whatever it'll be to get the tyre fixed??

I feel disillusioned and upset. I love my car. How could it be worth so little?? :-)

Choices

2008-10-31T20:00:00.006+10:00

“Man is nothing else but what he purposes, he exists only in so far as he realizes himself, he is nothing but the sum of his actions.”
Sartre

I have come across this saying a lot this week. Or maybe I am just noticing it at the moment.

Last week I had one of those I'm-25-and-what-do-I-have-to-show-for-myself-moments. I have always maintained that worldly possessions don't mean much to me. Which is probably why I have a car, a couch and a washing machine and not much else to put to my name.

In the past I have always justified by lack of possessions with my 'experience' of the world. I have travelled a bit, but so have most people these days. I can say I've 'done' England, South Africa, Brasil, Holland, but what does that actually mean? I've lived in some of those places, visited others, but for what cause? You experience life regardless of the country you're in. You wake up, search the house for coffee, get some form of transport to your place of employ, spend some time there working or emailing depending on your passion for the job, travel home, cook tea, eat, read a book, go to bed and the cycle starts again. This experience is nothing unique. The coffee may taste better or worse, the transport might be easier or harder to get, the work may be more or less interesting, the country we're in gives us variation, but nothing new.

Am I the sum of my actions? Aren't my actions the results of my choices? Aren't my choices dependant upon my situation? Isn't my situation dependant upon what I have been given?
Who gave me what I have been given? I come unstuck at this point.

Saying that I am the sum of my actions implies that I have control over all of it. But I am not so sure that I do. I was born with a level of intelligence, a level of aptitude to study, a body shape, all that closely matches that of my sisters.
Do I have the freewill to choose anything? Surely my choices are based on what I started with. Are we all born equal?

When I visited my sponsor child in Uganda I was convinced that it isn't true. Thembo will never have the choices that I do. Study at this university or that, travel to this country or that one, go to this restaurant or that theatre. My life is one of privilege. Maybe what Sartre means is that I have the choice to do what I want with that original endowment.

I spent last week in Rockhampton working on a program aiming find jobs for the long-term unemployed in the meat industry. The people I met there don't have the same choices that I do. I came away from that so convicted that I needed to help them. But how? By me deciding that the way I am living my life is the right way and enforcing that upon them?
They too are the sum of their choices, some of them choose not to work. Isn't that their right also? It makes me shudder to think of what happened to the Stolen Generation (and so recently!) But me decideding to get on a crusade to 'help' people might be exactly the same thing. For so long we (not sure who I mean by we, but roll with me) have decidedwhat should happen to the underprivileged in our society. We'll give them this or that benefit, put them through this training program, take away their money and their only source to food unless they attend our schools. Is this the right way? Who am I to tell another man what he should do with his life? Where does my authority come from?

I am more than the sum of my actions. I am the sum of my birth, my family, my friends, the amazing people I've met along the way, my education, my culture, my experience of the world. Some of these things were gifts of my situation, others the results of my choices. By believing we are simply the sum of our actions and choices we inadvertently condemn the man who has not made the choices to pull himself from his situation. But was he born with the same gifts as I? Are the choices I'm making even a valid benchmark to measure against? I am not so sure.

My choices make a difference. But I want to be sure that those choices work for good. Not just my perception of good, but true, honest, real good. What that is I am not sure, I only have my own bias instinct to judge from. But I am going to be sure to ask before I decide. To think before I act. To consider before I judge. Life is a gift, and what we do with it is our choice. I want to make the right one.

What do you do when your foot turns blue??

2008-09-01T18:19:00.006+10:00

Well, I think I have finally been taught my lesson. I have heard it said that I have an argumentative streak (I don't believe it :-) and this Friday it finally came to a head (or should I say a foot {sorry, can't help myself}).

I was at Lina's place celebrating her and Mikey's birthday (congratulations to you both again) when Greg and Mic started a theological debate with me. If we're going to be totally honest it might have been me who started the debate with them, but in any case, there was a debate underway.

Now it is my general habit, in such situations, to let my opinion be heard, or at least voiced, [although, if I am allowed to be honest again, if I don't think you've heard it, I am quite likely to repeat it]. And this is when it all started. One minute I was innocently standing on the veranda, voicing my opinion, and the next, I was on my ass {looking like an ass} trying my best to stand up again. The trouble was, you see, there was water all over the tiles, so even once I had fallen, I was still unable to get up, and spent (what felt like) the next minute or so trying to get my footing back. I looked like one of those 2 year old you see on ice skates. But worse, because I'm 25 and was still trying to keep from spilling my wine.

Anyway, after all the hullabaloo I decided that my ankle was quite sore and that it might have been time for me to sit down. So I did. Greg and Mic were very accommodating (or foolish??) and came and sat next to me so that the debate could continue. By the time we decided to leave Corinne had to almost carry me into the cab, and then out of the cab, and then up the giant driveway, and then into the kitchen for a cuppa. It was quite an evening.

So over the weekend I kept a close eye on the foot progress. It started to grow you see. Sideways. And then yesterday, it started to turn blue. It was a light sky blue at first, but now, it's a deep thunderstorm blue. I had a family gathering yesterday for Opa's {happy birthday to you too} and mum took one look at the foot and decided it was broken, and then it was all on. Opa getting bandages, Oma looking for a safety pin, mum wrapping, concerned aunts and uncles asking if I had fallen because I had been drinking too much [which of course I hadn't]. I had negotiated with Kathleen and settled on a pharmacist rather than an doctor.. I really don't like going to see them. But after a while all the fussing started to have an affect on me, and today I gave into pressure and went to see a doctor. He gave me a referral and I went for an x-ray this arvo. I'm fairly sure that it's not broken, I'd give it about a 89% that it's not. But, as they say, better to be safe. It would have been better if someone would have said that on Friday, when I was arguing in the water.. but anyway.

I have included photos for your viewing pleasure. Sorry about all the brackets too (I just love them at the moment, can't get enough) :-)

The first one is Saturday's swelling, and the other is today's midnight blue.

Middle Age

2008-07-28T15:19:00.004+10:00

There are a number of rights of passage recognised by society to be significant landmarks along the road to middle age. Your first drink at 18 (or 12 if you managed to find the key to the liquor cabinet), the first time you vote, your first car, your first wedding, your first kid (and even the the rest that follow) your first early retirement package, first grandkids. We all get excited, write cards, buy gifts, have a party, drink beer and recognise that this event denotes one more step towards 'growing up'.

A significant event happened on Sunday which made me feel as if I had finally stepped into my adult life, and you know what the worst thing is? No one seemed to see the significance of the event. Sure, Janelle and Corinne were excited, but I have a sneaking suspicion it was more about getting things clean than it was about my passage into middle age.

I bought my first white good. I own a VB sofa, a crappy almost dead car, and a 2nd hand (but still quite lovely) Samsung 5.5kg washing machine. So now I can drive to my house, sit on my couch, and listen to my washing go round. It may not sound like a complete life to some, but this is the closest to adulthood that I have ever come, and I must say, I am just a little proud :-)

Done & Done

2008-06-23T21:03:00.002+10:00

I have been thinking about posting this for a while, but I haven't been feeling very inspired, or interested, or even slightly animated. So I decided to wait until I was. That was on Thursday. It's Monday. So I am just going to give up and post.

It's not like I have anything that profound to say anyway. Just that I finished my first semester back at uni. I am now 1/2 way through my undergrad. I am excited. And tired. And getting old :-)

In an attempt to make this post a little more interesting - here is a photo of my desk. I spent a lot of time here over the last 3 months, probably not as much time as I should have... but that is another issue. The photo is of all the papers I had to read this semester... Me look smart eh??

New Limits

2008-06-07T12:00:00.002+10:00

With the recent heavy rainfall in Brisbane I have taken to warning passengers not to put anything on the floor when taking a ride in Clemmy. The leak is back. I'm glad to say that it's not as bad as it used to be, back in the days when we'd use a Maccas cup to bail the puddles before any journey in the wet, but there are some very little puddles. Cute ones really.

While at work yesterday morning I tried to take full advantage of the drying power in the momentary sunshine, and left my windows down a bit to let the steam off. You see, if there is no escape, the car fogs up to point where it really does become quite difficult to see. I was trying to do the right thing you know. But lately my mind has been a little absent, or maybe just focused on other things, or something. I was boiling water to cook my two minute noodles for dinner the other night and sat down just to make a few corrections on my latest philosophy essay and came back twenty minutes later to see the last of the water attempting to boil itself dry. What if I hadn't have come back into the kitchen for a cup of tea? Would I have remembered the noodles at all? Anyway, all this is to say that I have been a little vague lately, and not quite on the top of my game. So yesterday, when I left the windows open to let the steam out, I forgot to close them when I got home and inadvertently let more rain in. Opps.

So this morning, when I went to take Pees out to breakfast, (yep, I'm that posh, I even let her order a Bacon and Egg McMuffin MEAL!) I mentioned to her that maybe she should put her handbag on the back seat, you know, with the puddles and all. I was in the middle of telling her that it wasn't that bad, and how Clemmy and I had made our peace about the leaking when she saw it. She yelled a bit, and then laughed, ohh how she laughed.

There was a little tree beginning to grow on the passenger seat floor of my car. A tree! It's only about 1cm high at the moment, but it will grow. And even if I weed my car, who is to say that another will not grow in its place?

This has only happened today, and I'm not sure how I feel about it yet. Part of me is embarrassed, my car is that dirty that it can grow things. Although I have to admit, another part of me is a little proud. Clemmy really does have it all. Can your car grow trees?

Pumpkin Rollin'

2008-05-27T08:45:00.010+10:00

Dad and Sue introduced me to Pumpkin Rolling this weekend. Can't say I had ever heard of it before. Can't say I really believe I will ever come across it again. We drove 4 hours each way to Goomeri to see the pumpkins. There were big ones, small ones, some as big as your head, some even dressed up as penguins. There were camels in hats and men cracking whips, yummy icecream and baked potatos. All I can say in summary is that rural australia knows how to have a street festival. And I've got the photos to proove it.

What could be worse than a pub with no beer???

2008-05-24T18:13:00.002+10:00

A pub with beer, that won't serve it! Before you go thinking that maybe I'd had a few too many and they were right to say no, hear me out.

Last night, after a hard hard day at the office, we decided it was time to let our hair down (maybe that's not the best way to put it considering I have the longest hair in the group, but you get the point) and head to the pub. Being a uni student and therefore no longer able to afford cab-fare, it was decided we would go to Kathleen's local and then walk back to her place and crash there. Good plan me thinks...

But no. Seriously, no longer than 15 seconds after we walk into the pub, which I must admit was a little seedy, there was a massive bang and all the lights went out. And I thought the place was seedy before! anyway, once calm was restored by the bored angry looking bargirl she goes and decides that she can't possibly serve anymore, because they can't use the till. There must have been a generator, because the beer was still pouring and there were some emergency lights on. BUT THE TILL! Life cannot happen without the till!! We offered to pay cash, but no go. We offered for them to keep the change, no go. We offered to drink the beer out of the fridge, so they didn't have to pour, no go. Should we have offered to go behind the bar and work the maths ourselves?

I don't think she wanted to be there, this bored looking angry bargirl. But you see she was. She was there and it was her job to serve beer. That's just the way life is. Now I am not suggesting that this is the most important thing that has ever happened to me, but there is a moral here. Somewhere.

You see I worked at Payless Shoes at Mt Ommaney for 4 years. 4. Over the summer break, I'd work as much as I could to get cash together. Summer + Brisbane + shoes = BAD smells. Bad, bad smells. We used to walk around with airfreshner in our pockets and spray the isles when no one was looking. Even Mountin Fresh is better that cheap nasty foot smells in Brisbane. Anyway, one day I quit my job. I'd had enough. The smell was too much. That night I went to the pub, (this one served beer) filled in a little form and won myself the most amazing couch ever! So what is the moral? Thank you for asking, I was just about to get to that. The point is, good things happen when you quit bad jobs.

To you - bored angry looking bargirl, I say quit! Be free. And if you are going to stay there, get a calculator - no pub should not serve beer.

Red and Blue flashing lights..

2008-05-13T22:26:00.002+10:00

Was driving tonight, at about 8.30, through the middle of Graceville, Graceville of all places! and there, in my rear view mirror, were some red and blue flashing lights. Opps. That was my first thought. I can't have been speeding, I was driving Clemmy. That was my second thought.

Turns out they just wanted to sample my breath. I gave it to them. They looked suspiciously at my crappy old car... and let me be on my marry way. So on my way I went, marry and just a little nervous.

Procrastination???

2008-03-25T20:32:00.003+10:00

Decided that I was going to study over the Easter break, and while I managed to get a bit in, I had a lot more fun burning the backyard. You see we rented this great place but to be honest it doesn't look like the yard has been looked after in years.

Nel and I got out the other day and chopped a fair bit down, but then we had to deal with the problem of where to put it all... it's not easy in QLD where there are no green waste bins. So we decided to have a bit of an authentic fire BBQ.

It's been years since I lit a fire and I'm glad to say that I've still got it. Years of day camp and a bit of time on the farm and what do you know???

We put some jacket potatoes in there for dinner which turned out fantastically. Decided that damper is my next mission, not sure if they still even sell Golden Syrup though....

UQ

2008-03-18T20:26:00.004+10:00

So after 4 very difficult, challenging, full weeks we are finally going to get a break from uni :-) Jokes, but seriously, I think I could get used to this!

Uni is going ok so far. The content is interesting, and (for the moment anyway) I think it is even going to be interesting enough for me to finish it!

Our house is great. Haven't got any photos yet, but it's all going really well. I finally moved in with all my stuff for the first time in about 6 years. And, most exciting of all I am living with my VB couch!

Not sure if I have told that story yet... It was a cold and wintry night. Nah, jokes, it was stinking hot in Brisbane, and I had just finally after many summers of stinky feet quit my job at Payless Shoes. Amy and Corinne took me out to celebrate at the Indro Ho. On my round I went to buy a jug of VB (alright, I know, it was all I could afford at the time) and the lady asked me to fill my details on a card to go into a draw for something or other.

It turned out to be other. Seriously 6 months later while I was home from the farm for a weekend I got a call saying that I had won a 3 seater VB green velvet couch. It was possibly one of the best things that ever happened to me :-)

The point of all this, was that since I have never properly living in Brisbane for the last while, and mum isn't too bigger fan of VB green, the couch has been living at Kate and Gordon's place (bless them) and only now have I finally been able to live with it. I've included photos for your reference, just in case you were having a little trouble picturing it.

In other exciting news I have taken up Dragon Boat Racing. Well, not really taken up, I should more say I am going to try.. One of the girls said that I should bring a towel! Really, really not planning on swimming in the Brisbane River.

Road Trip Update

2008-02-20T07:55:00.002+10:00

The funny thing with life is that after you make decisions you kinda have to follow through with them. Going back to uni seemed like a good idea at the time.. But then I had to quit my job, pack my stuff, and hardest of all say goodbye to Pees and Bev. Who moves out of a place where there is free rent, packed lunches and a hot cup of tea ready for you when you wake up in the morning???? Melbourne is a great city, made so much better by my sister and her friends. Awesome girls.

Anyway, this post was supposed to be about the road trip.. To preface the whole thing I should probably update you on the state of my car. After approx 8 years of neglect when I came back from my trip a few months ago it became clear that the car would need some work. A lot of work actually. So I fixed everything they told me to and I think my car is now about 50% new. Which sounds good, but unfortunately none of this is reflected in anything external.

Infact the outside of the car is getting worse. The windscreen wipers are so rusty they are almost falling off, and someone tried to break into the car in Melbourne, so now only one of the locks works. But the car has now become a bit of a diamond in the rough so to speak, looks terrible, but really, really, deep, deep down, the car is a gem.

Sorry, I digress, the point was to tell of the epic road trip embarked upon to go start uni. I finished work on Friday and Pees and her makes organised a bit of a dinner party, so we drank lots of wine and ate lots of food, as you do. Then on Saturday morning I headed off far too early in the morning. Long drive that one, especially on your own. I arrived at the Palace in sydney at about 6pm.

Had a bit of a mad time in SY catching up with everyone, playing pool, drinking wine, watching people make icing for a cake in the carpark. Then when I was on my way to catch up with Ads someone decided to run into me. Little bugger. It was like one of those slow motion accidents where you can see them coming for you and begin to yell at them to stop before they smack into your car. So now Clemmy is sporting some scratches down her left side. I was thinking about it and I have decided I don't mind too much. That's not the side I use regularly anyway..

So after all that Emma and I left Sydney at about 4pm. We decided just to see how far we could get and then find a motel where ever we could. After the last experience with the weird man in leather we were keen to keep it safe.

We got into Coffs at about 10.30 only to find the Formula 1 was closed. But that is where things get cool. They have these touch-pad-atm-like-machine-things outside their motels, and all you have to do is enter some details and your credit card and it spits out a key! Welcome to the 21st Century!

We woke to some fantastic news about Amy and Chris which started the day off just right. And then headed back to Vegas. Got to tell you, by the time I got here I was weird. You know those so-tired-moments when the sentences don't seem to be able to connect into one another? Well the last couple of days have been them.

Today is the day that we move into our new place! Excited! and I need to go to uni to get other stuff sorted (not so exciting, but important all the same) I will be sure to post some photos of the new place when I can.

Memory lane

2008-02-09T23:00:00.000+10:00

Just sat for a bit and read through the blog. Geez there is some rubbish on here. You would think, posting it out there for anyone to read, that I would be a little more careful with what I wrote, but nope, not really. There are bits when I'm mad, bit where I happy, mostly bits where it's really late at night and I am sitting around with my laptop for a bit before I go to bed. Weird hey? Like, imagine what our grandparents generation would think of that.

When Elissa went on exchange we used to write her letters and we were able to call only once a month. When Carly went, we used to log on to check the family email account twice a week, then, secretly, I set up my own account (imagine that!) so that I could speak to Pees with mumbles reading. When I went to Brazil we spoke once a week, and emailed almost daily when I was living in my second house there. Now, you just get on skype, enable webcam and you talk for free.

Sometimes I worry that all of this is going to leave me behind soon... Maybe it has, maybe no one blogs any more, and this is one of the things of old. I mean, I can't even get the DVD player to work. If I match up the coloured cables and it doesn't play on the screen, what do I do then?? My husband, who ever he may be, would want to be good at that sort of stuff. There are other talents I have that I cna bring to the relationship. I make good tea. Last week we learnt how to make Peach Jam and a little more interestingly Peach Schnapps.

Anyway, before I digress too much, things have changed. And I was just sitting around wondering at what point I would stop changing and moving with what was happening, or maybe if I had already and just not noticed. Maybe that's what happens to all of us.

The Time Has Come.

2008-01-24T12:23:00.000+10:00

As of 25 Feb I am going to be a uni student again. Can you believe that they still hold a place at UQ after you defer for 6 years?

Bachelor of Arts double major in psych. Me gonna b smart eh?!

The GREAT Ocean Road

2008-01-16T17:53:00.000+10:00

So I did something new the other day. I went on a holiday by myself. Never tried that one before. Sure I have travelled alone, but going on a holiday is different. But I'm telling you, it's awesome.

I have been to Melbourne a few times now, but never seen anything of Victoria, so I took advantage of my enemployed status and hit the Great Ocean Road. It is such an amazing drive. I stayed in a little town called Camperdown, about an hour out of Warrnambool and spent 3 days just chillin around, having a look at stuff.

Next time I do this drive, I definately want to do it in a car that is a little more fancy that my 20 year old Mazda, but considering her age, Clemmy did herself proud me thinks.

The current plan has me in Melbourne for at least another month or so, and I am definatly looking to try and get a few more road trips in there. This place has everything!

So this is what there is to see:

These are the rocks

More rocks.

Me with the rocks.

Clemmy soaking up the view.

How scary is this sign? Considering this is about 500km from the nearest airport, you'd want to hope that by the time they got here they would have figured it out??? :-)

And then, I took a C grade road. I knew that in the UK A road were good, B roads were ok, and C roads, well C roads you take what you can get. Forgetting all this applied in Australia I took a C road, and well, I got what I was given. It got a bit rocky there in my little beast, Clemmy doesn't have the biggest wheels in the world, but after about an hour of bumping along this dirt track I made my way back.

I think it's time to Elf Yourself!!!

2007-12-23T15:56:00.001+10:00

One of the annual delights that cannot be missed. Come on, you know you want to...

http://www.elfyourself.com/?id=1709704967

www.elfyourself.com

Enjoy!

Now THAT is a good idea.

2007-12-21T13:54:00.000+10:00

Just found this on a fb group wall:

everyone in my family is getting an individualised interpretive dance for christmas....

Is that not the best idea you have ever heard??!!

Bring it on!

Christmas Cheer!

2007-12-20T13:49:00.001+10:00

Am feeling that this year is a little lacking in Christmas Cheer, and wanted to do my bit to make sure I wasn't contributing to the reign of the grinch.

So Merry Christmas to all, and to all good night!

The plan is underway...

2007-12-09T12:15:00.000+10:00

So far so good.. Step one complete: I quit my job. Hurrah!

There is something really good about being unemployed and homeless. Thinking it might be something I look into long term, if only i could figure out how to finance it all..

Anyway, I have had the most amazing time in Vegas for the last two months. This really is a fantastic city, lovely people, lovely scenery, lovely atmosphere. Definitely a city worth spending more time in.

Am leaving for Sydney on Tuesday, due to arrive sometime Wednesday night. The car is looking and sounding good to go. There were some amazingly disconcerting noises coming from under there somewhere. Thanks to Mikey they seem to be under control now, which is a fantastic relief. With that, and the new map that the guys from work got me, Janelle and I might even make it to Melbourne!

So generally, to recap, life is great, and worth enjoying!

The Plan! - Take 25

2007-11-21T21:47:00.000+10:00

So I've come up with another plan.... (strange and out of character I know...)

But the plan is this:

12.12 Pack all I own (and that will fit) in the little car and drive south.
13.12 Keep driving south
14.12 After a little more driving in a southerly direction I should arrive in Sydney!!
15.12 Hang in Sydney
16.12 More hanging
17.12 Hang some more
18.12 Pack the little beast again, and drive south again.
19.12 Drive a little more south and a little to the left, or is that west, or inland, or maybe just in a more downishly direction.. but in any case, I should arrive in Melbourne around the 19!!!! Hurrah!!!
20.12 Hang in Melbourne
21.12 More hanging
22.12 Hang some more
and so on and so forth until it comes time for me to get a job and stop bludging off my sister.

So I do realise that this plan will only take me to Christmas, and that there is probably some more planning that needs to go on.. but, all that being said, I have a reasonable idea what I am doing for over a month ahead.. and that is definite progress.

Really looking forward to catching up with everyone in SY and MB, missing you all like crazy.

Just found this

2007-11-13T22:17:00.000+10:00

Was going through my gmail unstaring emails from long ago, and came across this thing i had written and felt inspired to share..

Jeanie Mayo came and spoke at church a couple of months ago, she asked one of the guys to come up on stage and hold her glass of water, then she bumped him and the water spilt all over the stage. She kept talking, and then bumped him again, the water spilt. She did this one more time and then asked him why the water was spilling. He turned around and said it was because this beautiful woman kept bumping him, (crawler) we all laughed until she said no, it was because there was water in the glass to begin with. Interesting thought.

See the reason that I would get angry at things that were happening was because there was anger inside of me. Do you get what I mean? If I was at peace and at rest, then it would have been fine. Like they said at leadership, we are a tube of toothpaste, squeeze us and what is inside comes out. You can't blame the person doing the squeezing if you don't like the flavour. (did they say that at leadership, or did I just make that up??)

But it is an interesting thought hey? What if I couldn't blame my circumstance for how I was feeling, what if I really was responsible for all my actions. Like really. How often do we just blame everything on the circumstances, how often do we get angry at the person who is making us mad, rather than dealing with the anger that is on the inside?

This whole theory is so much bigger than just anger, it counts for everything. Joy, fear, aggression, love, compassion, jealousy. What if we all stopped for a moment and took on some accountability for how we were reacting to things. I'm thinking it would make a bit of a big difference.

Anyway, this is my plan. I am going to work on having more love and compassion inside, so that when i get squeezed, I give out something that will do good for the world, and for me, and for the people around me. Sounds a little go-save-the-world-ish to me, but then, if we're not trying to save the world, what are we doing here really? Wow, in trying to lighten this whole thing up i think i just made it a whole lot deeper.. thinking i am going to leave it at that. :-)

You an Aussie???? Eh????

2007-11-07T20:34:00.000+10:00

I just came across a phrase:

Ask the master to pass a banana.

Sounds a little odd? Maybe, but what a fantastic way to tell if someone is a aussie! There is no way that you can fake that one.

Was chatting to my cousin the other day, and she said that she had met a a guy who backpacked through Oz for a bit and had defined Australia's in like this..

If they come from Adelaide, they ask you what church you go to.
If they come from Melbourne, they ask you what school you went to.
If they come from Sydney, they ask you how much you earn.
And if they come from Brisbane, they ask you in for a cup of tea.

Pretty accurate, I've been an aussie all my life and have never been able to define it like that. Got to love the outside perspective.

While we're talking about people from different perspectives.. just have to tell you what happened to me the other day. I went to a gun shop the other day (long story) and was totally shocked at what I saw. There were one Pauline Hanson poster with her hugging a aussie flag, a signed photo of Pauline, and this amazing sign, it said "Austrians against immigration, protect the Australian identity" Have you ever heard of such a thing?

Now I don't want to put anyone down here, and I really don't want to offend. But if we against immigration, and all about protecting the aussie identity, then should we all really be adopting Aboriginal culture. After all, we're all immigrants after them.

My view is my view, but I tell you what, every time I meet someone new I learn, I grow, I learn to look at things differently. We all have so much to learn. Just because someone is born is Australia, or says "Ask the master to pass a banana" the same way I do, that by now way means to say that we share the same views, or have any greater right to live in Australia than I do.

Now I know I am probably getting a little carried away with all this, but what is nationality about anyway? I mean, really, look at it, the English settled in Australia, but now, because of a law someone decided to pass, I cannot stay in England, the English can only stay in Australia for a limited time as well, yet all of the EU countries can come and go as they please.

And while I'm on it... lets just talk about property ownership for a bit. How on earth can we really justify the purchase of a piece of land. If you start from the beginning, who are you going to buy it off? God?? The chemicals that caused the big bang? How did we come upon the concept that we can own a piece of earth and control who can and cannot walk upon it? Where did we get that right?

Anyway, a bit of a ramble, but these are my thoughts. Nothing against anyone political views, and nothing against property ownership. Sometimes I just get thinking about these things.

So I was at work the other day...

2007-10-21T20:17:00.000+10:00

It was a Sunday and I was at work, not the best, but sometimes it happens. This guy who works in another department to me was helping me clear up the office. We went up to drop some boxes into the big bin, this guy says to me, you'd better bring your car keys.

Car keys? I ask. Aparently so.

We walked to the carpark, stopping outside a white van. This guy turns to me and asks a question, one that I will never forget. Do you use tampons or pads? That's right, looking directly at me, he just asked, just like that.
My responce....? I looked away, and mumbled under my breath, "depends".. opps, not good, not the right responce. Now he's going to think I am using depends depends, like those pads for people who have trouble getting to the loo in time!!!!!
It was not going well..

In responce, all he did was open the van, and start loading a plastic bags full of tampons and pads for me. It was explained to me that some of the boxes we're as full as they could be, that space was not being used as well as it could be, I was shown how I could save more space by adding an extra tampon into the boxes of two, making them into boxes of three, then if I wanted, I could keep that in my bag for an emergency. Great, stratigic tampon carrying tips from a middle-aged-I'm-ok-talking-about-tampons-with-women-man!

I couldn't believe it. This was actually happening. Here I was, in the work carpark, loading a plastic bag with STOLEN tampons, pads and pantyhose. OMG! Can you get arrested for that??

You know what's worse?? In all the imbarrassment, I just dumped the bag in the boot of my car to do the best I could to forget about it. Then... I had to get my tyres changed. Think I remembered to take all the tampons out before I got them to check my spare???? To all the men at Bob Jane's thank you for your tack. They just calmly moved them onto the back seat and said nothing when I went to go and pick up my car. At least some people are still a little discreet about these things.

Not so unemployed anymore..

2007-10-06T08:55:00.001+10:00

Luckily for blogger I now have a job. Cancel the lawsuit, it's been sorted.

Started this hecticly busy job on Monday with DPI, is good, pays good, which, I must say, currently is the most important thing. Call me a capitalist, but 5 months without a pay check and the size of the next one suddenly becomes important. :-)

So.. that was not what I wanted to talk about. There is not really anything huge that I wanted to say. Just a bit of a ramble really I guess. Have been home now for 20 days. Seems like a bit. But really, it's not.

So I have gone from having all this time to chill out and do whatever to being super busy and totally spacey.. turns out getting back into this whole work thing can take a bit out of you.. you know, that whole having to use your brain thing :-)

Excuse me!

2007-09-27T09:39:00.000+10:00

Blogger does not have unemployed as a job option!

All I can be is non specified. I am not non specified, I am unemployed. That's employmentist.

I currently am bum. I sit and drink tea and sometimes beer. I have read 4 books in 8 days. I have watched 3 movies. Do they think this is a free ride? Is that why they feel the need to negate my occupation or lack there of??

I am in contact with recruitment agencies. I travel around the city in a suit, in the heat, at their whim, for no avail. Why does blogger feel the need to berate me so?

I was in a kiwi, throwing a kiwi, at a kiwi!

2007-09-26T08:51:00.000+10:00

So, I mere 30 odd hours and 4 flights from Canada and I was in NZ. The surf board made it, although they did have to ask me what it was in Saskatoon.. can't say I blame them, there's no ocean for about 1000km from there :-)

Clare came to meet me in Wellers and then we took a bit of a road trip to see her folks in Taronga. I just couldn't get over it, in one day you drive though like 10 different types of landscapes, flat with sheep, mountains with sheep, farming with sheep, cities with sheep hanging out on the outskirts. It was awesome. Makes sense how they were able to film all of Lord of the Rings there.

On Saturday we played some putt putt, I let the Kiwi's win, didn't want to get them all fired up about how good aussie's are at sport and all that. Then on Sunday on the way back we stopped in at the ski fields to have a look. Now what I am about to say may sound a little blonde, so please allow me to justify. On saturday while we were chilling at the beach, eating thickshakes and playing putt putt, clare got sunburnt. On sunday, when we got in the car to go to Wellington, it was still hot. So I wore my jandles/flipflops/pluggers/thongs. Makes sense right?

Well then we got to the snow.. my first time walking in snow since I was 5. I was so excited. We jumped out of the car and raced up to have a look. And.. it turns out that playing in the snow in jandles is not a good idea.. I very quickly lost all feeling in my feet, and at one point walked off leaving my pluggers behind without noticing. :-)I now realise the error of my ways. One more lesson learnt.. isn't that what they say travelling is about?

Saying goodbye wasn't the easiest thing I have ever done. Geez I miss that girl. She's a bit of an inspirtation that one.

I have decided that I want everyone to come with me. How fun would that be? We could all travel round in a group of 50 or so! So maybe not the most practcal.. but am definately feeling the effects of spending the last 4 months catching up with everyone everywhere, and now looking at the possibility of not being able to travel again for a long time. Ohhh uni.. why must you cost so much???

Ohhh Canada....

2007-09-26T08:18:00.000+10:00

So.. I have totally been home for over a week now.. but I've conciously decided not to get all hung up about it, these blogs have definately not been in real time anyway. That being said, it does feel a little odd to write about the rockies in 30 degree Birsbane spring heat (that's right, it's not even summer yet).

Had the best week in Canada with Kim. It was seriously awesome, not sure that I have laughed that much in a long time. That girl is one of the worlds best. We started in Saskatoon (WOW FLAT!) and then went on a bit of a road trip to the mountains. Awesome, amazing, huge, awe inspiring, and flippin tall. Banff was cool, totally what I had imagined Canada to be.

So as not to bore you all, thought I would just throw up a few photos of the highlights, so that you can all see for yourselves.

Ohh and by the way, the stupid surf board made it. It's here with me. Haven't had even the slightest inclination to look at it let alone take it out.. Am hoping that this will come.. it has to come, there is no way that I took this board all this way for nothing :-)

Diary Excerpt - Brasil to Canada '07

2007-09-10T07:47:00.000+10:00

When I was in Brasil volunteering in 2003 I bought a surf board, a giant one. I left it there at the time, thinking that it was just going to be too much trouble to take to London.. so now that I am living in Sydney I was thinking that it would be cool to have my baord with me.. It would have been easier if I would have been able to post it from Brasil, but I don't trust their postal system, not a bit.. so it had to come with me.. below is the story of that journey, which unfortunately is not over yet.. I am still in Canada.. still NZ to go.. but we'll take one step at a time.

This day was so traumatic that I think I just have to share it here once and for all, then if anyone ever ask me to explain what happened I can just direct them here, and never have to relive this in the telling again. So here it is, straight from the diary.. think I will leave the bits that don't make sense, think the jet lag might have been doing its work...

4 September, Toronto, Canada, 29 hours travelling

I want to write this down, there has to be a record somewhere of all the crap (edit) that went on.

Cris dropped me at the Rodoviaria, it was so sad to say goodbye again, not sure if I should keep coming here, it is so hard to say goodbye everytime that i have to leave. Maybe it is just better if I stay away... but anyway, by my calculations, if I paid for the bus ticket between Congonhas and Gurrulhos on my card I would have $R 45 for the day. I had some breakfast at the Rodoviaria before I got on the bus, I bought a book, $20 gone.

Caught the bus to Floripa fine, 3 hours, but not major problems. The transfer between the Rodoviaria in Floripa and the airport on the public was fairly traumatic, but more auckward than disasterous. When I went to check in at the airport I was told that the cost to take the surf board was $R100! Almost more than the cost of the ticket! On further inspection I found out that I could send it via cargo for only $R40, I was told that it would catch the same plane as me and that I would be able to pick it up in Sao Paulo at the cargo hold which was walking distance from the airport. So that was what I did. I had to walk around Floripa getting it all sorted, and had to draw more money from the cash point ($5 charge from ANZ - Bless them) but anyway, it was gone. I went and got some lunch, and ran into the Criciuma football team! Which was cool. Got on the GOL plane to Sao Paulo fine, the flight is just 1 hour 20 mins, so you hardly even reach cruising altitude before you start the descent.

Before all this had happened I had made a plan to go to the TAP office at Gurrulhos and collect the $US100 that they owed me from when they lost my bag when I arrived. I needed to get to Gurrulhos ASAP before the office closed. (to explain - Sao Paulo has two major airports, Gurrulhos - International and Congonhas - Domestic.)

But back to the surf board, when I went to find out the exact location of the cargo hold I was told that there was no way that I could walk - it was too far. They couldn't bring it to me, I had to go there, with all my bags. I could catch a public bus, but they're not so safe for foreigners, especiallywith giant backpacks. So taxi it was. After buying the book in Criciuma and lunch in Floripa I was down to $R20 or so.

So my plan was to get a taxi to the cargo hold, get the taxi man to wait with me, pick up the board, and then get back to Congonhas ASAP so that I could get the bus to Gurrulhos in time to see the TAP people and check in for my flight to Toronto. I checked with the taxi guys, $R15 each way, so being safe (so I thought) I got $R40 out. (another $AU5 for ANZ).

Ok, so I gave the address to the cabbie, explained the situation, he took me to the cargo hold, we chatted from inside the cab with the GOL people for a bit, they said that the board hadn't arrived yet. Not wanting to run up the meter I let the cab go and went inside to investigate.

Turns out that there are two GOL cargo holds in Sao Paulo. I was at the wrong one. By the time they told me the cab had left. So now I was marching down the streets of Sao Paulo with my very western face and a giant backpack. I found the other place ok, but they didn't have my board either.

Turns out that it takes 1.5 hours after the plane has landed for the cargo to be released. First I've heard!

So now it's 5.45, the sun is setting, I'm in some bazzar cargo hold in some industrual area of Sao Paulo with no board, and only 1.5 hours to get to the other airport in time to check into my flight to Toronto. So I started talking options with the guys, I was thinking that they probably go to both airports regularly, could I get a ride? No. Aparently not. It was going to take too long for the guy to load and unload his stuff.

The bus between the airports takes an hour, and leaves only once an hour. If the man at GOL in Congonhas would have told me that it takes 1.5 hours for the cargo to be released I could have taken the time to check teh bus times, but not, no one decided to mention that fact until I got to the 2nd GOL cargo hold.

By 6.20 the board had arrived, and I was in a cab on my way to Gurrulhos direct, there was no way that I was going to be able to make my bus.. there were only 2 slight complications 1. I only had $R30 or so 2. we had one hour and then minutes to make 50 minute drive, should be fine right? But this is Sao Paulo, this city has the same number of people as the whole of Australia and some of the worst traffic jams in the world. The government recently tried to build a metro system. Unfortunately they didn't research so well, and then they started digging they burst water and gas pipes and had roads and even houses falling into the holes in the ground.

So back to our drive, my cab driver was lovely. He did his best to get me there as soon as he could. We chatted along the way, but how do you know when you can trust someone? When we arrived at the airport there was a $R97 fare on the clock. I needed to get cash out from the airport, (another lovely fee from ANZ), but what was I surposed to do with my backpack and board? Could he be trusted to sit in the cab with it and not drive off?

By this time it was 7.50, I was surposed to be at the airport at 7.30. All I could do was make note of his cab number, 864, and the first three digits of his number plate, then I ran to find the cash point, I withdrew $R100 and got back to the taxi stop as fast as I could. He was still there! Praise God! So I gave him the $R100 and went to leave.

While we had been chatting on the LONG drive to the airport he had suggested that I get a receipt for the cab fare for that I could get a refund from GOL. It sounded like a good idea to me. He didn't want me to leave and got back in the car mumbling about something. He started looking for something, I figured that he was checking for a pen so that he could write me a receipt, but when I offered him mine he said it wasn't that. If only it was that easy.

He was looking for his calculator. Aparently there is a 40% additional charge because he had to leave his zone. So what was a $R97 fare now became $R145. I was now about 40 mins late to check into my flight and I still had to negociate with Air Canada about taking the surfboard. What could I do? I didn't have any time to go ang draw more money. Why didn't he tell me about this charge before I went to draw cash? I gave him all that I had, about $R130 and ran to check in. I felt so bad, the guy had been so nice to me, and now I was ripping him off. By what could I do?

I ran to the Air Canada desk, well, as much as you can run with a 20kg backpack, a 5kg dayback, purse and 9ft surfboard. After another $US50 for the board, a long wait through security and immigration I made it to the gate, just. Once we were all on baord the pilot announced that there was a problem with the control tower's radio we were going to have to wait for a while at the gate, so we did, for about an hour and 15. It's normally a 10.5 hour flight to Toronto. But because of the delay in Sao Paulo I've missed my connection to Saskatoon.

So, another queue through customs, and then at the connects desk with my bags and board on my back because they can't connect them themselves and I need to take them through security, and now I'm currently on standby for a flight at 12.15 and failing that, I am definately booked on one at 4.30.

They say that either way my bags will come with me. I have decided not to believe what they say anymore. First thing I wanted to do was call Kim to let her know that I was not going to be on the early flight. I was hoping that my mobile was going to work here, but aparently Canada is another of the countries that it prefers not to operate.

So I had to draw money so I could use the public phone. I tried for $C100 - Insufficient Funds.. $C40 - I was in. And talk about blessed, when I went to find a shop so I could change the notes to coins what did I find but a Starbucks! Hurrah!

Change in hand I found a phone, after a few tries of my own I had to call the operator. Aparently even though the phone says that you need to dial 0 first, you do not. If you dial a 0 first you connect yourself to Hungary. It cost me $C5 to call Kim and say that I was not on my flight and that I was going to be there either at 1.40 or 5.30.

So here I am, tired, smelley, hungry, poor and with the most giant pimple persisting to grow right under my nose.

On the bright side, 1. I am going to see Kim today, 2. I am stuck in an airport in the first world while I wait, 3. As much as I hate it at the moment, I have my surfboard with me 4. I am about to, hopefully, get on a cute little plane with external propellers 5. Although there is no TAP office here, there is one in SY, so when I finally get home and get in touch with them, I will have $US100 to spend.

Toronto - 31 Hours Travelling.

Counldn't get onto the 12.10 flight. It was full. What are the chances of everyone turning up for a flight? Good aparently.
Think I should go and call Kim and tell her that I am not going to be there till later. Got to love the 9 hour wait in the airport. I am going to go and see if they can give me a food voucher or something. Man I am hungry.

This trip is going to take me 36 hours - 15 hours fly time, 2 bus rides, 3 planes, 2 taxi's, 2 times through immigration, 6 security checks, and 1 5am phone call to Kim (opps, didn't realise that there was a time difference!!)

Fotos from Brasil..

2007-09-09T12:39:00.000+10:00

Have been to Brasil 3 times now, and each time I swear that I am going to take some photos that will show what the country is really like. Turns out, well from my experience anyway, that that is not at all possible. Kim and I went to the Rockies yesterday, and it was exactly the same thing... you stand there, looking at the most amazing mountain range, take a snap, and then realize that there is no way that a little 2D photo is ever going to be able to show others the wonder. It's just like a crappy 50c post card.

But, all that said, I did take some photos, and even if they don't show it all, they do give a bit of an idea of the country that I love.

So from the top.. 1st.. my beautiful nephew 2nd.. Lia, Du e Leonardo 3rd.. Cris, Henrique, Paula and I 4th.. the area around Abadeus where I volunteered last time I was there (more to come on that)

Actually, speaking of more to come, there is a lot more to say about the time I spent in Brazil, but that will come in time.

Photos from Cananda coming soon too.. Coming into Brisbane on the 17th after a stop in Welly to see Clarey..

xxo

So your not that attached to stuff hey?

2007-08-20T23:40:00.000+10:00

There once was a time (up until last week actually) when I would have told you that material things didn´t matter to me, and that I was happy to live with whatever I had at the time, that I had learnt to be content with what God had given me and that I was not striving for more.
Then.. the police stole my bag. 6 days in the same pair of jeans and suddenly the story was a little different. I wanted my stuff.

Anyway, after many many phone calls and my first arguement in Portuguese it was finally delivered on Friday, too late for me to go to the first part of the guaduation ball, but all the same, at least I got to go in the end.

Turns out that there was nothing in the bag that they didn´t like, they were just doing it to be annoying. In the end they didn´t even open it. So all my flash backs to movies like Bridget Jones were totally unnecessary.

So the plan for the moment is to go to Rio Grande do Sul this week, and go and meet my nephew. Then another week in Criciuma and I am off to Canada! then New Zealand, and then home. Geez it´s gone fast. A diary and a half worth so far :-)

I made it to Brazil! But my bag on the other hand...

2007-08-14T22:36:00.000+10:00

Ola Gente!

Hurrah for Brazil! Made it, and love it here already. It sounds right, it looks right, it smells right (as in it smells totally wrong, but that´s the right wrong.. if you know what I mean) , even the food is just right! I LOVE THIS PLACE!

My bag on the other hand, doesn´t. I have come here 3 times now, and 2 out of 3 times my bag has decided to either stay where we were, or go on a holiday elsewhere. Lucky this time I was prepared, and even luckier this time I have travel insurance with no excess. All that being said you must please excuse me, I am going shopping :-)

Going to my `home´town this morning, will update in a bit. Love to all.

Wales

2007-08-09T18:20:00.000+10:00

I had a bit of a traumatic journey from Yorkshire to Wales. I was supposed to get the train from Beverley at 12.30, to be in London at 4, to get the bus to Wales at 6.30. In my mind that gave me enough time for a coffee with Nel, but it wasn't to be. The first train hit a cow, so that obviously put a hold on things, the second train got stuck with it's doors open at the platform, and couldn't go unless they closed. The third train got stuck behind the second, and rather than just taking all the people off the second and moving it empty, we all just had to wait until they could fix the doors.

2 hours and 45 mins later I was on the move, I changed the route a bit, and went into Hull, the train I got on was going all the way to London, but I was only allowed to go on it as far as Doncaster, where I had to change and wait for a GNER train, as that was what my ticket was. They did offer to allow me to pay 30 quid to get a new ticket, believe it or not I declined :-)
Anyway, the bus turned out to be running late, so even though I didn't get to coffee with Nel, I did make my connection, and after 13 hours travelling we made it to Wales. Needless to say I slept well :-)

The plan for Saturday was for us to climb Mt Snowdon, when we got there it was pouring with rain, windy, cold, and generally crappy. I decided that given that I had not even heard of Mt Snowdon until 2 weeks before, and that I was feeling more like a coffee than been blown off a mountain for 6 hours, I decided to go tour another town. Elissa and Bap went up, the crazy cats, they made it all the way to their credit. Elissa is still hurting 4 days later the poor thing, but it is definately another experience they can add to the list.

We went to the smallest house in the UK, and got the little lady all upset by asking what made a house and house and trying to argue that a converted shed could probably beat this. She wasn't impressed, but I still maintain it is a valid point. What does make a house a house?

Anyway, we cruised around North Wales, go a stamp in our passports with the longest place name in the world (until the Kiwi's decided they wouldn't be beaten that is), drank coffee, drank beer, went to the beach, caught a steam train, saw Thomas and generally had fun.

Can't tell you how good it was to get to London on Sunday night and know that I wasn't going to have to travel anywhere for a week!

Bell Ringing in Yorkshire

2007-08-09T17:05:00.000+10:00

Still can't believe that I can just sit here and keep coming up with new titles for these post with all the places I have been able to go. How cool hey?!

Last week was such an adventure, I absoloutley loved it. I have been crapping on about going bell ringing for weeks, ok months, and it was all that I thought it would be but more. I met Chris in London and we jumped on the FIRST CLASS train to Yorkshire. The church that his dad works at is amazing, huge, old and very church like.

We went straight to the bell tower. In my mind I was kind of expecting the little boys to be flying up and down in the air ringing the bells, you know, just like in Sound of Music, but no such thing, there were adults of all ages pulling on ropes in a rather dignified manner. Turns out it is a little more complicated than just pulling a rope, and that all these bells have specific positions, if you don't set it right you can smash the stay and the bell will ring free. Who knew it could be so complicated?!

At one point Chris asked me to stop smiling, and I really wasn't able to, it was just too cool to be able to see this in a church so old. We went down the pub with the ringers after, and they hooked me up with the details of some churches in Sydney where you can ring. I can feel a new hobby coming on, I really can.

The next day after my ears stopped ringing we went to York, and Chris gave me a guided tour, including the train museum. I ate a Yorkie in Yorkshire. Did a tour of a old old church, with an old old key. All in all it was an awesome couple of days.

Sweden

2007-08-06T17:08:00.000+10:00

Here they are, two of my favourite people in the world...

I had the most magic few days in one of the most beautiful countries in the world. Em and Jacob live in Goteborg, this lovely city in Sweden. Seriously, I am not sure if I have ever seen a city that works so well. Public transport looked like it worked, the streets were clean, it looked safe, there was free parking for people in smart cars.. I don't know, it just all seemed perfect.

It's been so funny to go to so many different countries in such a short period of time, I have done a bit of travel in the past, but to do see so much in just a few weeks, you can really get a feel for how things work. This felt like one country that did.

Just to explain the photos above, Em and Jacob took me to the beach, Swedish-style, then we had a BBQ with some of their mates, who were lovely, and then Em forced me, I mean invited me, to go and see some fish at her work, it was seriously the coolest place. :-) That's the photo of us with the legs. Don't think I have ever looked better :-)

It's so good to be able to go and visit people, there is only one problem, we keep having to say goodbye. What we need to work on is a plan where we can take all our favourite people with us. That would be cool.

South Africa!

2007-07-25T18:46:00.000+10:00

Feels a bit funny writing about SA since I am in Sweden, but the internet hasn´t been so easy to come across. We had the most fantastic time in SA. That is one amazing country. Sometimes if you were to forget yourself you could easily think that you were in OZ, the countryside looked that similar. But then, the "Yah's" would start, and you definately know where you are :-)

We spent the first week in Pretoria with Nandi and her amazing family. It was so cool, South Africa hospitality is something that I think we aussies have a bit to learn from. They were amazing. From here we went on Safari to Pilansberg. We were so blessed, and saw everything SO close.

Then Ringo and I hit the road, and went to visit Heather in Pietermartizberg (questionable spelling on that one). Turns out that Corinne had met some of the most amazing people ever while I was in AU, Heather and Caroline are definately some of my favourites. From there we travelled down the coast to the Cape.

I took thousands of rock and sunset photos on the way, but I won´t bore you with all of them (maybe just one coz Ican´t resist), generally the trip was fantastic. In other good news my AU phone seems to be working again, there weren´t any texts waiting for me, so it seems everything that i was sent in the last 6 weeks has disappeared into the unknown.. so sorry if anyone has been trying to get in touch with me and I have not been responding..

I've been in London for a few days, and have SO enjoyed seeing everyone. I keep thinking that I want to move here again, but need to keep reminding myself that I am here while it is summer and I am on holidays, what this is is not the norm. Winter would come :-)

It has been an amazing trip, and I just canät seem to get my head around all that I have seen, but then I am not actually sure that I ever will. Will update again soon hopefully, take care of yourselves and each other, love ya!

Photos from Uganda

2007-07-01T20:55:00.000+10:00

This is Junior. He was brought in on our first day at the Babies Home. We were in Uganda for two weeks and in this time we saw such a change in him. The second photo was taken on the day we left. Hard to imagine that some of the other kids from the babies home came in a similar condition. He is still very sick, and has TB, which is not normal for someone so young. Would be great if you could pray for him.

This is one of the other little beauties at the babaies home.

These guys I met when I went to visit Thembo my sponsor child. I have never seen poverty li like this. It was heart breaking but inspiring all at the same time. There is so much work to be done. I am on such a campaign to get everyone to sponsor at least one child. It was so great to see the work that Compassion was doing. They are making such a difference.

And this is Thembo. The first photo is all of the family and neighbours that came to see me, the second is him. Didn't get a photo of him smiling, mainly because he didn't. He was so afraid, the whole day. I was the first white person he had seen, and it was only the second time he had ever left the villiage when he came to pick me up. Poor kid. His family were lovely, they served me a huge meal, and gave me a gift (can you believe the generosity???) The third photo is of his mum and dad in front of their mud hut.

And to finish a few photos of the girls. It was the most amazing team, I love them all to bits! That is Sheila in the orange, trying to block the smell from the toilets. Didn't work. Nothing works. There have been some very interesting toilet experiences, but no need to get too much into that here :-) And the second photos is Man Jenny on her birthday at the building site. Our house looks grand, and we are master builders, who would have thought hey?

So there they are. Hope you enjoyed. Have a thousand stories to tell, but will save that for another day, I am at the mall and the girls are ready to go. Am in SA by the way, and we are going on Safari tomorrow, going to find me a giraffe!

Love you all lots, take care of eachother.
xxo

Uganda

2007-06-24T20:24:00.000+10:00

Week two in Uganda, and I have seem and experienced more than i thought I would in the entire trip!

This place is amazing and I am in love! Before you get too worried I am talking about the kids, not some african man I am planning to marry... they are the most beautiful things in the world, and am seriously considering taking a few home with me... ok maybe not, but am coming to the decision that kids are actually wonderful, beautiful and fantastic for hugging!

The people we are staying with have been looking after us so well. it feels a lot safer than brazil even though the poverty is on a different level. We have finished building, and would like to say that I am a master builder, but unfortunately, I am not sure that the style they taught us here would cut it in Oz.. I can mix mortar, lay bricks, do corners and even cut mud bricks with a trowel. Think that will help get me a job?

We go to visit our sponsor children tomorrow, 7 hours drive to get there, and then we stay over night to go to their villiage on tuesday. I think that I am actually going to be able to see where he lives and where he goes to school and everything, which will be great. We went to a market to get some things yesterday, and teh whole processs of bargining and getting the best price was the most interesting thing ever. I am not sure how many white people they get in this place, but my thought is not many. They even offered to marry me! Could have something to do with my passport.. but details details..

Haven't got the camera cords with me, so no photos this time, but you'll be glad to know that there are some people in these ones, mostly cute little african people, but people all the same.

Hope you're all well, catch you in a week or two. Sarah

AFRICA!

2007-06-11T06:26:00.001+10:00

I am going to Africa tomorrow!! Can you believe it?? Maybe you can actually. Maybe this is what happens, you book a trip, and then the time passes and you go. Maybe that is exactly what I should have been expecting, but somehow, I on the other hand, can't believe it is happening.

This is like a dream holiday. There is nothing that I am not doing, no place that I wanted to see (on this trip anyway) that I am not going to see. I honestly walked into the travel agency and gave the man my dream list, and he put together the most complex itinerary I've ever seen. I am going to cross the equator 4 times! 4!

Em asked me the other day what the first thing I wanted to do in London was... first I was thinking about going into Piccadilly, but really, what is a place? To be honest, the first thing I want to do is find all the amazing people I did life with, I want to find them and hug them, and then drink a lot of coffee while we catch up on what has happened over the past 12 months. Not just in London though, that's the awesome thing. I am so excited to be able to go and see all the people that have made such a difference in my life. Brazil, Canada, South Africa, New Zealand, London, Sweden. How small is this world getting!

It's only really been over the past couple of days that I have started thinking about the fact that I am actually leaving as well as going, if that makes sense. Sydney has been an amazing place to live, and there is so much that I have learnt, so many amazing people I have met, I have been able to work in a great job with some awesome people. It's been awesome.

We have been asked to bring our own condiments to the project in Uganda, so I must away to Coles to get me some vegimite. :-)

I am going to be in Africa for the next 6 weeks, and am not sure how much access I am going to have to the net. I am definately planning on taking a LOT of photos, which I should be able to upload as I go, failing that, I will be sure to post them when I get to London.

Take care of yourselves, be safe, look after each other, that's the key.

xxo!

Adventures Galore

2007-06-06T09:45:00.000+10:00

I have been thinking lately that I have been doing a lot oframbling, and not so much Adventure telling, and to be honest, there hasn't been that many adventures worthy of telling. That was all until Emma and I decided to take a little road trip to Brisbane in the beast we call Clemmy.

She's a good car, always has been, but I've got to say that 2 years living outsides mum's place and 6 months living at the beach in Maroubra haven't done her any favours. As we learnt in the Easter Distributor Disaster the petrol gauge does not work these days, and unfortunately the list of things that are not working is getting longer. So when Emma and I got in the car after work on Friday to start the journey there was a bit of a Clemmy Orientation Speech that went on. Emelie has had it, as have Kim and Shelley, and to their credit no one has ever complained that there is no internal light, the headlights are broken, the water spray things for the windscreen don't work so you have to wind down the window (if you can) and pour water from a bottle in an effort to keep this blog short I will stop.. but you get the idea.

Anyway, I digress, back to the adventure. Emma and I left George Street just after 4 and drove straight into the biggest traffic jam ever, got to love Sydney on a Friday night, after all that was negotiated we hit the open road. We opted for the two-hours-on-two-hours-off road trip method, which I think works quite well, but am definitely open to discussion, but seriously, how else are you going to tackle a 12 hour drive in 16 hours?

Anyway, all was going well until about 1.30, we found ourselves in the terrible position of being low, like LOW on gas and stuck in the middle of nowhere, with no petrol stations open and no idea when we were going to find the next one. I prayed. A lot. When we were about 30km over what my tank usually gives me we came across a shop that was open, it was about 2am by this stage. The lovely man informed us that we were 38km away from the nearest open garage there was no way that Clemmy was even going to make it down the road, let alone into the next town.

We met a kind local, who offered that we go to his place and grab some of his fuel, he said he had some spare in the garage. He said that we shouldn't worry, that there was no one at the house, he assured us that he was totally safe... kind as the offer was, we took the other other alternative available, we parked outside the bowser and waiting for help to come. It did, at about 6am. I was never a girl scout, and brownies was always more about the food than it was survival tactics, but I was still prepared. I had a sleeping bag, warm socks and a warm cup of tea.. what more could a girl need (aside from fuel that is :-)

Anyway, the photos are below.. well, they will be when blogger decides to behave... it was a great trip and defiantly one that I will remember. We finally got into Brisbane at about 8.30am and was home with my mum eating toast by 9.30. The rest of the weekend was more amazing that I can possibly tell you, and there were more miracles and more lovely-ness that I can possibly begin to explain. I love my family, they are the best in the world.

Kiama Ward Visit

2007-05-31T08:29:00.001+10:00

In an attempt to fight the I-live-with-you-but-don't-ever-spend-time-with-you thing, last weekend the palatial ladies went on a bit of a road trip to Kiama. It was the most amazing day, and the most amazing trip. There is something magic about spending a day is a cute little aussie town with nothing to achieve and no place to rush off to.

We stayed in a room above the Kiama local pub (tick that one off the list) and spent the morning just hanging around looking at the local markets, checking out the blowhole and sitting dangerously high on the edge of the cliff.

These ladies that I live with have become some of my best friends in the world. Just today when I got in the car to leave for work I found the most lovliest card and a perfect gift sitting on my dashboard waiting for me. I don't think I have ever felt more spoilt in my life.

We were talking on the trip about the new season that we are all heading into, and I truely believe that God has put us all in this place and in eachothers lives for a reason. It is only when you really know who you are, and how much you are valued and loved that you are able to give that confidence and grace back to the world. I have been encouraged and loved, inspired and made stronger by these women who are the most amazing example to me. Thank you, more than words can say, thank you.

The Tetris Queen

2007-05-29T22:12:00.000+10:00

We had a Tetris-off today. Yes yes... I am the best. I won. Not that it's about winning at all... :-)

Half an hour of intense competition, there was shouting, waving away of bosses attempting to steal my attention, I had to ignore the phone a few times, and at one stage actually did ask my boss to just hold off for a sec as I was about to win... but really could your lunch hour be dedicated to a better cause??? (ok, so maybe when talking about causes this doesn't seem so important, but you get what I mean.. right???)

This is the link..
http://www.macquariecentre.com.au/games.amx

The rules?
You've got 1/2 an hour, you must never have played this version before, and then you play as many times as you can to get the highest score you can in 30 minutes...

I got 24,452. Winner Winner Winner!!! Winfred would be proud...

If your keen let us know how you go... and no cheating.. and girls, if you're keen for a rematch I'm up for it anytime.

Alive again.. almost..

2007-05-19T10:51:00.000+10:00

So this past week has been the biggest wipe-out ever... I think I have had the worst cold in the whole entire world and that no one, ever, like ever, has ever been as sick as I was.. or maybe that's an exaggeration.. maybe.. but I was sick.

And then last night, randomly, after a day of Sense and Sensibility, and Pride and Prejudice, I got off the couch. It was amazing, it all just felt better all of the sudden (maybe deep inside I was worried that I was going sitting through just a little too much Jane Austin, maybe it was self-preventatice). Anyway, just wanted to post a shout-out to my amazing flatties who took care of me, and loved my even though I was diseased. THANK YOU!

And to Kim.. so sorry I didn't get a chance to wish you the Happiest Birthday ever on your actual birthday... but I hope you had the most fantastical birthday ever! And hope that the party was awesome, looking forward to seeing all the photos (of all of the outfits!) Love ya lots lady, hope you got the v special day that you deserve! xxxo!

Compassion

2007-05-13T09:35:00.000+10:00

I got my sponsor magazine from Compassion yesterday.

This was the photo of the little guy on the front

Is he not the cutest thing that you have ever seen?!

Brian gave the most amazing message last night, it was all about what he called the Justice Generation. I was so inspired, so encouraged.

In an month from yesterday I am going to meet my little compassion child, his name is Thembo. I keep finding myself trying to imagine what kind of a life he lives, what his house looks like, what his parents are like, his brothers and sisters, his friends, his school, everything. To be honest I don't think the picture I am coming up with is going to be even remotely accurate.

I am being asked a lot what I am going to do when I come back from this trip, where I am going to live, what job I am going to have, and if I am going to finally go and finish / start my education. These are all really good questions, but also questions that I really don't want to answer. I don't want to lock myself into something now that I am going to feel obligated to complete when I come back. I want this trip to change my view on things, I don't want to come back the same. I want to learn, I want to grow, I want to be even more inspired that ever to make a difference in the world I live in. I have no idea how that is going to be outworked, but I do believe that if you ask for a heart for injustice, if you ask for eyes to see what is going on in the world, it will be given to you, and that can only be a good thing.

Candid Camera

2007-05-06T09:33:00.000+10:00

I was walking down to get some fresh bread yesterday morning, and was thinking about how long I have been living here, and how little I knew about the local area. So we went to have a look around, and found the most amazing beach ever. It's tucked away in Port Botany, there were the upside-down trees, white sand, shells, clear water, planes flying close in over head coming into land, massive big ships, a port with big container things and cranes, and a pelican, all within a 50 meter radius. It was all a bit random, but awesome at the same time.

Last weekend my mum came to visit. It was so good to see her. I was feeling all proud of myself yesterday, as it had only taken me a week to get all the photos to her. Problem is, there were two photos of mum, 5 photos of me, and about 25 photos of the giraffes at the zoo. I really do like giraffes, but I like mum more :-)

I have this crazy tendency to get a little obsessed with things, and then take 1000 photos of that, and nothing of anything else. Like when we went to beach yesterday, I took 10 photos of this shell I like, and none of me, and just one of Em.

I am about to go on this massive trip, and I can just see me coming home with 100's of photos of trees or sunrises, and like none of my sponsor child, or all the friends that I am going to visit.

It was awesome when Kim was here, we would go somewhere, we'd come home, me with 20 photos of a rock or something, and her with all these great shots of us and the people we were hanging out with, as well a one or two of the rock.

Not sure where I am going with this, but I guess I am asking for help. When I see y'all on the trip, and get all interested in something on the ground, could you all please gentle tap me on the shoulder and remind me that in a few years when I go to look back on all these trips, the thing that I am going to want to remember most is all of you, and not the grass, lovely as it may be. :-)

All that being said, I did get some good shots of the giraffes...

ANZAC Day Dawn Service

2007-04-25T12:25:00.000+10:00

So.. it was 2.30 am when my alarm went off this morning. It was 3.30 by the time we got there, and about 3.50 by the time that it started to pour down with rain.

There is something amazing about it, something profound. I was standing in the rain, getting wet, having umbrella wars, while thinking about people that all that time ago fought a war. How have we come to be so distanced from the past or even wars that are happening today. It all seems to0 foreign.

But these men fought. They sacrificed. And they lost. For what? For us? For what they thought was right? For what they were told to fight for? And who am I to judge?

I appreciate all that they did. Those wars fought yesterday have influenced our today far more that we acknowledge on a daily basis. How can you ever express gratitude to people who have died for their country? By keeping their memory alive? By choosing not to forget? By enjoying what we have, and stopping every now and then to think about what had to happen so that we could live like we do? Maybe, maybe all of the above, maybe it needs more, I don't know.

I don't know how I feel about war. Sometimes we are forced to engage in ways that we would not hold as an ideal. Often action does need to be taken. But who decides in what form that comes? They said this morning that 3,000 Australians are currently engaged in warfare. I live in a democracy, does that mean I sent them to war?

Of late I have been reading a bit about Gandhi, Martin Luther King, and Jesus, all people who faced opposition, but chose not to engage or retaliate with violence. Is this what Jesus was saying about turn the other cheek? How do you balance that with standing up for what you believe in? Where is the middle ground? How many wars have started, and continue, because we all have different ideas about where that line should be drawn.

Do we live in a society with freedom of though? Or just freedom to think within the box that have been set and enforced by our society, politicians, teachers, parents and friends. I don't like to think that there are Australians at war. But I don't imagine that I can even begin to understand enough to comment on how we should engage otherwise. So I don't like it, but I can't fix it, so I say nothing. How many others are left in that position?

So there it is, there are my thoughts on war. I have written that much to say that I don't know what I think. What I do know is that I am glad that I know God. I am glad that I live where I do. I am glad that I have the freedom to live the way I choose. I am glad that I can learn, and that I have the option to choose what I believe. Today is a day to remember, and maybe just engage in a bit of thought about it all. Maybe one day I will be able to articulate what I believe about it all, maybe I won't. Maybe this is the kind of issue that doesn't have any clean lines.

No one is going to steal April!

2007-04-16T22:24:00.000+10:00

So after a few months of some slack blogging I have decided to make a concerted effort to blog more.. There have been times when the randoms stories and events have seemed to flow, and it's not that they're not happening at the moment, it's just that they don't seem to be all that blog-worthy.. (and we're also being paid a lot NOT to blog about certain things.. hey Sue? :-)

But anyway.. after the last blog about the glorious sleepy Easter I had, I travelled off to another week of action and adventure in Melbourne. Geez I love that city.. Anyway, was able to catch up with some of the lovelies of this world and had a fantastic time. Thought I would shoot some photos below..

Don't know how I was able to do it, but I went to a wedding this weekend and spent a whole week in another city and managed to come home with 33 photos, and not one of them was of anyone I know. But I did get my favourite graffiti wall and Starbucks, and of course, about 50% of the photos were of sunrise/sunset.. best not challenge tradition too much :-0

I think I might have been tired...

2007-04-07T19:11:00.000+10:00

It all started at Church on Friday morning.. I got there around 9 and was hanging out chatting with some of the guys. It was a great service. Got home at about 12, thought about what I might do for the day.. was feeling a little tired, so thought I would have a nap.

Woke up at 5pm.. was still a little tired, so went back for another little nap..

Woke up at about 11pm.. it was a bit too late to get up, so went back to sleep..

Woke up at 10am.. thought I should really get out of bed.. so got up, watched a movie.. then went back for another nap..

Thinking I might have an early night tonight.. am still feeling a little tired.. who would have thought that all that sleep could go one and you could still be tired?

Either way, I feel a lot better now, and am very very thankful for the holiday!

THE Plan

2007-04-04T12:58:00.000+10:00

So.. after 10 years of planning and over 1000 versions of my Itinerary.. I would like to announce the final (for the moment anyway) plan for my GRAND ADVENTURE!

8 June - Finish work!! can I just say that again?? on 8th June I am going to finish work!
12 June - Uganda
30 June - South Africa
20 July - London
13 August - Brazil
3 September - Canada
11 September - Leave Canada

And there you have it! A big fat trip around the world.

Can't wait to see you all! At the moment I am still working on plans for internal flights and trips etc. Most common theme at the moment is coffee, lots of cups of coffee and LOTS of catching up with everyone. Miss you all more than I have ever dared to express on this wee littl' blog of mine.

Kenny

2007-03-28T20:55:00.000+10:00

Kenny would have to be one of the funniest movies ever. Even funnier than elf (ok, maybe, I'm not 100% sure on that one yet, that might have been an overstatement, can i take that back?) But it is funny.

Can't say I envy the job. Makes mine seem like a walk in the park.

Again I have nothing profound to say.. But I like this movie.. is that enough to blog about??

Easter Distributer Emergency Crew

2007-03-22T21:18:00.000+10:00

This is him. This is the man. The Easter Distributer Emergency Crew.

Freudian slip?? maybe...

But it worked. I broke down, and Amy came and rescued me chocolate. And all seemed right again.

(for those who are confused I may have miss typed in the blog below.. maybe...)

One way to get on the radio...

2007-03-13T18:29:00.000+10:00

I WAS ON THE RADIO THIS AFTERNOON!!!!

It went something like this:
There is a car broken down just outside of the Eastern Distrubuter in the middle of the three lanes of racing traffic. Cars are back up to the other side of Sydney, and the girl / damsel in the car is looking decidedly stressed. In other news...

It was eventful, that much is sure. Luckily the lovely Easter Distributer Emergency crew man came to help me. He took Clemmy for a ride to the Shell where the lovely NRMA man came and got the show back on the road so to speak. And then.. to top it all off, the lovely Amy lady came to rescue me at the Shell.. and it was a proper rescue too... wallet rescue as well as a chocolate fix! that's the sign of a true friend!!

There was one really good thing that came out of tonight. I took advantage of the knowledge of the NRMA man and showed him the bit that had been in the back of my car since i found it under the bonnet a few weeks back and guess what?!??!? It is just a spare. Aparently it is a fan belt, and he said that there was definately one there already. So winner! It's all ok!

God Bless the Eastern Distributer Emergency Care man! God Bless the NRMA man! and God Bless AmyLou!

Bank Error In Your Favour.. You (almost) Win $6,450

2007-03-06T11:28:00.000+10:00

Almost. Almost I was rich.

Got a litte excited today when I got onto online banking. I was almost rich. There was a Credit Adjustment of $6450 in my account! Whooohooo!

Thought I should keep my head and remain calm and just clarify things before I stood, collected my bags and quit my job. So I went to the bank. Lucky I did. Turns out it was a bank error. Problem being in real life when they make a bank error in your favour it's not really in your favour at all. You spend lunch time and the bank trying to figure out what they've done and then they take the money back anyway!

Ahhh well. You win some, you loose some...

Hey-ho

2007-03-04T09:51:00.000+10:00

So.. don't actually have anything to blog about. But have been thinking that it is about time that I get into the habit of blogging. So I am just going to write, and hope that something not so weird flows out.

It's been an interesting few months. Yesterday morning I did this crazy thing and got out one of my old journals to have a bit of a read. Scary thing. After a random selection I started reading this entry from the first week that I got back from the UK. Talk about a crazy head space.

So much has changed since then. I am in such a different place. Which is a good thing me thinks.

Funny how time changes things. Or actually, is it time? Or is it just the choices we make? I think that for some people the passing of time doesn't actually change their heart at all...

Someone asked me the other day when I decided to go on this big trip that I am planning. I couldn't tell her. Some decisions just seem to creep up on you, and for those, it is only the actions we take that show us what we have decided in our hearts.

I've been reading this thing lately that talks about thoughts being the deciding force behind our beliefs, and how our beliefs lead to our choices, and how those choices determine our actions. Interesting concept. It's puts the power straight back into our hands.

Anyway, I am not sure where I am going with this. It is just the thought process that I have been going throughlately. It's been putting me in a place where I am been actually thinking about the thoughts I have and the choices that I make, which can only be a good thing.

There it is, in all it's random glory (cheers to you Amy) Those are my first thoughts for March.

:-)

Opps.. Who stole February???

2007-02-25T16:51:00.000+10:00

Ok, so it's been a while. I claim it's not my fault, and someone has stolen February.

Lots has been happening, too much to write... they say a picture tells 1000 words, here are 8 photos, that's 8000 words.. sounds like more than enough for my February blog quota :-)

This is the big-ass truck that we got to drive.. Didn't run over nor damage anyone or anything! How impressive is that!

These are of the palace. Nice hey. Took the one with the flower just for you Pees. At least you didn't have to stand in the middle of the road waiting for this one. :-)

And I am not sure that I could even find the words to describe the photos below. So I'll let them stand as they are.

Homeless..... Not Me - Take 2

2007-01-24T11:18:00.000+10:00

So once again I am not homeless! Yay for having a place to live!

We are going to move into the Palace on Friday, but get the keys on Thursday. I have been thinking that maybe we should camp out on the first night just to stake our claim...

How uncanny is this... Last night we went out to celebrate in Coogee and had cocktails, I'm usually a daiquiri kinda girl but the need for a Singapore Sling over took me, and then when I got home, I got a text from my mum who was with my sister in Thailand also having Singapore Slings. Weird. I must have forgotten to turn the ESP off. But seriously, I haven't had a Singapore Sling since that fateful flight Elissa and I took back to London a few years back... Sorry, I digress..

Point of the story is that we are going to move into an awesome place, and I am totally excited!

Quote of the day

2007-01-22T20:59:00.000+10:00

Ringo just sent me an email with this in it:

A girl friend is never farther away than needing her can reach.

I like it. Thought I would share. Good day to all xxo

Proud Mum to Concerned Parent..

2007-01-20T11:02:00.000+10:00

So turns out Clemmy isn't doing that well...

The little oil light kept flashing.. so I did the good thing, went in a bought oil (even got the right kind! :-) but when I went to fill her up there was this strange rubber circle thing sitting on the top of the engine. Where did it come from?? Where is it supposed to go?? Is it a vital part of my car??

But then I thought about it, I had driven the car to the shops.. the rubber thing can't have moved while I was in BigW.. Clemmy must be ok with out it.. So I put it in the boot and drove home..

I keep thinking I can smell something funny in the car.. is it just me?? am I paranoid??

She keeps on keeping on.. 19 years that car has been going.. I don't think she is going to let some little rubber circle get in her way!

Simple Mathematics

2007-01-17T21:49:00.000+10:00

This
Plus This

Equals This

And Then This Happens

Who would have thought that you could get

1 x mattress

1 x Bed Frame

1 x Suitcase

Many x Random Assortments of Crap

2 x People

all into Clemmy and then drive across town???

That car is a gem I'm telling you, a gem. I'm like a proud parent.

BTW - Tonights menu included tinned peaches, yoghurt, and baked beans on toast... Have a new theory that you can eat what ever random combinations you want as long as you leave enough time between courses... You've just got to think these things through sometimes.

Moving House..

2007-01-15T21:15:00.000+10:00

So the time has come for me to leave the beach-side resort. It has been a good season. Lots of laughs, parties, slurpies and sunburn. I am currently having much dificulty bending my knees due to exccessive back-of-knee-burning (I've got nothing on your story though Clare, you win that one hands down!)

There is a lot to do when you move. Packing, organising, looking for houses, trying out the locals of the places you are considering, asking important questions, is there a local Bistro? Can we get a $5 meal? And for me, the big big one is, can I walk to the bakery?

When I wake up on a saturday morning I want to me able to walk, or scoot (on my new ELECTRIC SCOOTER), to the bakery. I want to be able to get there in that semi-waken state, with sleep still in the eyes, so I can come back home, make multiple cups of tea, and eat fresh fresh bread with vegimite and butter all without really waking up. That is life.

Anyway, please excuse me, I digress.

This moving out has forced me into action. I took down the fairy lights which i had been in the tree for the last few months, I walked around the house collecting all the Candy Canes I had hung like stockings with care, I even considered hoovering.

But the biggest problem so far has been the cupboard. There is so much random stuff in there. I really don't like moving food. Last time Rinnie and I moved it was a nightmare. Rinnie, Pees and mum got on the tube so heavy laden with stuff (I was forced to ride in the car, someone had to:-) and I blame most of the excessive weight on food.

So this time I have decided to eat my way through it. But it leads to some very 'interesting' combinations. Tonight for example, I had fish with garlic sauce, M&M's and a glass of coke for dinner. There has been excessive custard consumption going on also since we kinda over catered at the Orphans Christmas.

Is it good for me??? Well, who knows. But is it good eating?? For sure. Mum used to say that when I lived under her roof I was going to have to live by her rules. I used to tell her when I lived by myself I was going to eat chocolate for dinner. Never actually thought I would though... ahh well, desperate times, desperate measures :-)

Gross.. Seriously Gross

2007-01-13T06:38:00.000+10:00

So last night I went to bed at about 3 in the end.. and for me, that is unusually late. I am the kind of loose-it-when-it-gets-past-midnight kinda girl normally. So when I got into my room last night there was a fly and a cockroach. I considered being proactive and catching them, but decided that it wasn't really fair, they had been there first. And the fly would be alright, at least it wasn't a mosquito, and the cockroach - well I was on a bed, and it's not like they can climb up and get me.

Wrong. I was so wrong.

I was lying there about half an hour later still not able to sleep and then all the sudden i felt something on the back of my neck. I slapped around like an idiot, and then ran to turn the light on. There it was. This massive roach on my pillow! How gross is that. It was in my bed! It was on my while i was half asleep. Amy was talking about that whole you eat 8 spiders in a life time thing a while ago... and you're right, I don't know how they count, and I don't know if it is true. But imagine if this thing would have climbed in my mouth!

Who knew that cockroaches can climb walls?????? I am not sure that I feel very safe anymore. You had better believe there is going to be a nightly check going, and there is going to be no sharing anymore, I don't care who was there first. I pay the rent. And I do not want to share my bed with any insect, ever again.

You're out buddy. Gone.

Birthday Lovin'

2007-01-13T00:43:00.000+10:00

What a week!

It's almost 2am on Friday night / Saturday morning. The logical thing to do would be to go to bed, and then get up and write this where there is at least a slight chance that something logical might come out. But who wants to be logical???

This has been an amazing week. Birthdays are awesome. I don't know how many people have called, texted, emailed, commented, come over, gone out and generally found a way to wish me a happy birthday. It's been amazing.

You know what the best thing is? All the texts, emails, cards, hugs, calls have ended with my favourite words. Well just wanted to send a big I LOVE YOU back to everyone. I honestly I don't think I have ever had so many ppl say it to me in such a short period of time. You should see how big my head has got! :-)

Seriously though.. tonight, Michael, this amazing friend of mine, not only opened his house to us, but planned, organised, invited, shopped, got a massive chocolate cake (with my name on it!!!!) set up, then picked ppl up from the station, hosted, laughed and generally had a raucous time and then cleaned up after us all for this amazing party! Talk about a blessing! Thank you!

I think we should all have Birthdays all the time! Kim has this amazing idea of celebrating half year Birthdays.. not a bad idea.. I tell you what, this week has meant so much, I have been truly touched (didn't even have any champagne addy :-) . Thinking that I am going to add another resolution to the list... tell people how much I love them, often, repeatedly, until i am sure they know.

Hmmmm.. just re-read this post... think i might be getting sentimental in my old age... not good, not at all good... If it's like this now.. imagine when I'm 60!

Thieves in Redfern!

2007-01-05T07:17:00.000+10:00

So last night I went to dinner at a friends place in Redfern (the Hackney of Sydney for those non-Sydney-Siders), I was chatting to my Dad on the way there (hands free of course) and then did the responsible thing of getting off the phone so I could pay full attention to the map turning (ohh, I mean reading) that was required to get me to this obscure part of town.

I found the street, 5th time luckly, and called a friend of a friend to get the right house. Dondon said it was simple, just half way down the street, the grey apartments, park infront of the first tree. So I did. Then I waited for her to meet me so she could show me the right apartment.

Then I got the call.. 'Where are you?' Well I was in front of the first tree wasn't I. Where was she was more the point! I then had this horrible thought that I might be on the wrong street (it has been known to happen) so I jumped out of the car to run up and check the street sign. As I was in Redfern I did what all responsible people do and locked my car. As soon as I closed the door I knew I had gone wrong. The keys were in the ignition. Again. Keys in the car, car locked, me on the outside of the car, third time since I've been in Sydney.

I asked Don to bring a coat hanger and then we got to work. That's right, three girls, one coat hanger, four passerbys, and one very dodgy part of town. The girls prayed, and we got it!! We broke into Clemmy. No training (that's if you don't count the number of times I've watched the NRMA man break into my car) just runnning on a prayer. I didn't know whether to be happy or seriously concerned that I was able to rescue my car.

I'll tell you the most embarrassing part of the story.. Can you believe I actually thought to myself that I should keep some coat hangers in the car, just in case it happens again, then I could use them to open the doors... hmmm.. If I could get the hangers, surely I could get the keys.. Oh dear.. If I only had a brain.. :-)

Christmas '06

2007-01-01T19:49:00.000+10:00

This a video of Christmas day.. Kimbo got me the coolest cap guns. It's been a few years since I've run around the house shooting people. Not since we set the last gun on fire when we were kids..

Christmas day was awesome. We had about 15 or so people round for Christmas lunch, which envolved a lot of eating and laughing, which is the perfect combination!

We drove to Melbourne on Christmas night. Turns out it's quite far away... we drove most the way through the night, stayed in the Maccas carpark for a few hours, and then arrived just in time for the Cricket!!!!!

Yay for Warnie!

The rest of the week was spent chillin', catching up with the folks, eating and reading exactly what a holiday should be!

All in all it was a fantastic festive season.

Elf Yourself

2006-12-22T07:19:00.000+10:00

Ringo sent me this link..

This would have to be the coolest thing ever!!!!!

Check it

BrisVegas Take Two

2006-12-18T20:03:00.000+10:00

So this weekend I was able to pop home and soak up on some Christmas Cheer from the family.

It was fantastic. Lucky for me I live by the beach, so I wasn't too gutted when it rained the
whole time, it actually worked in my favour,
I don't know if I could handle that heat normally :-)

Winfred the Winner Winner Winner!

2006-12-12T21:31:00.000+10:00

I won Winfred on the weekend.

I was a "Winner, Winner, Winner!!" That's what the woman kept yelling.

And that's what happened.

I won.

Winfred is mine.
He's sitting on my bookshelf. Talk about excited!

Monday Nights

2006-12-09T09:36:00.000+10:00

Every now and then you just need to take a Monday off work and go and take photos of nice looking things. It's good for the heart.

Being a temp has it's advantages. If you don't want to work, you don't. There is no guilt. No feeling bad because your taking a sicky. While I was sick I probably could have gone to work, but sometimes you just need to not work you know?

I am going to have 13 days off over Christmas. The thought frightens me. I don't think I've ever have 13 days off when I haven't been unemployed or on a holiday somewhere. What am I going to do with all that time?

I was thinking 6 books should be enough to get me through. A run in the mornings, swim at the beach in the afternoon, maybe even a quick trip to Melbourne for New Years and lots of photo taking, cooking, eating, guitar playing, talking and general tom foolery.

Amy - the definition of tom foolery is "Silly behaviour of no great wit." Thought you might like that one. :-)

Perfect

2006-12-06T14:50:00.000+10:00

‘I wish I was a glow-worm,
Glow-worms are never glum.
How can you be sad,
When the sun shines out your bum?’

Rox - Never has a poem hit like that one just did. It says it all. I put in on the wall of my depressing little cube at work. How can you not smile when you read something like that.

Thanks you!

Ohhh, and if you have any profound idea for Christmas pressies please do let me know. Once again I have not started even thinking of gifts, let alone buying them.. Ohh to be organised... Am not going to let it get to me. Today I am a glow-worm!

Pinch and a Punch for the First of the Month

2006-12-03T07:57:00.000+10:00

The whole pinch and punch on the first of the month thing has been a bit of a tradition with my dad for a long time. It tends to go in seasons, and at the moment it's all on. This month, I won! Again!

I love it.

I have been accused of cheating sometimes, on two counts:
1. I do it via text
2. It's not always the first of the month when I am getting everyone in England.

Because this is my blog, and I am allowed to, I would like to support my own argument..

In the first case, if I could afford to fly to London / Melbourne / Brisbane and get you all I would, I can't, so I resort to texting. I would imagine that getting someone via text would be a lot better than via email, so I don't understand what the problem is. 'This is the new generation man...'

Secondly, I think it totally applies to the time zone that you are in, how can I help it if the English are slow?

Rinnie and I did a bit of investigation.. Turns out that they don't do this in Canada, nor Brazil, nor America. As far as I can tell they do do it in Australia, New Zealand, South Africa, England and all other cool places.. Why wouldn't you take the opportunity to smack someone once a month?? Keeps life interesting I say..

Not much..

2006-11-29T17:46:00.000+10:00

You know when you feel like posting something, but there is really nothing to say.. so you wait a few days, hoping the feeling goes away, then it doesn't. You know that you should wait, until something exciting has happened, something even remotely interesting...

But nothing has. Well not true, exciting things have happened this week at least they're exciting in my mind. It's all about perspective I guess.

I slept 9 hours last night. That's right, 9! I even went to work late.. Usually I get there at about 7.20, not today, 9am I arrived. Cruised on it, put my bag down, and went and made myself a cup of tea, just like that.

I was excited. But it's not really blog worthy.

They're funny things blogs. I often wondered why I write one.. Why I keep it updated.. I think Bron and I kinda made a point a few weeks ago, I know what is happening in her life, and she knows where I'm at.. But then other people, non-blog people, some of them I have lost. So do I write this to keep people up to date with what is happening in my life? If so there is a lot more that should be going in here I guess, but who wants to read a fact file?

So I write about whatever. Most times I write about nothing. Who even reads this thing anyway??

I was chatting with Elissa the other day and she told me that she read it. Well I had no idea. I don't know why I didn't think that she would, but I am really glad she does. Hi Lis!

I've realised that you can't think about that one too much. It's dangerous. Think too much about who reads these things and you end up writing nothing. "What will people think???" honestly, I am just beginning to get to the point where I really don't care.

I remember Gary said something like that once, and it totally took me by surprise. I remember thinking, 'but he is the pastor, he is supposed to care about what we think, and then make changes to accommodate'.. talk about off the mark...
1 Cor 4:3 says "It matters very little what you or anyone else thinks.. The Lord Himself will examine me and decide."

Now that's a cool thought, esp since I know what He thinks of me.

Was chatting to Adam just now about this, now fair call, I have a gnome tattooed on my back, and fair call I punched my flat mate, but this is who I am. I know that deep down somewhere Addy loves the fact that I'm not "normal".. hey ads?

Am reading this book by Holly Wagner at the moment, it's called God Chicks, so far it is talking about being a 'b u chick'. It's good, but dangerous. At the moment I live in a house with a whole bunch of girls who are all about being themselves, and it gets kinda wild. I love it. There is something awesome about not knowing what is going to happen, and know that whatever does happen you are going to be laughing about it for ever.

So there you have it. A long (possibly the longest yet) post about nothing. I think this is going to become my new theme. Unless of course Addy and I win another ham at the RSL tomorrow for his Bday. Then we'll be straight back to the news..

Cricket

2006-11-25T14:44:00.000+10:00

So it's Saturday afternoon. About 4 pm. It's hot. There is a big bottle of water in front of me. I just had a jaffel with baked beans and cheese. And the cricket is on.

Does life get better??

Oh wait, we're just about to woop England, yes, yes, I think life did just get better.

:-)

Are you Australian or what???

2006-11-22T21:58:00.000+10:00

So it all started at about 4.30 am.

We got up, got ready and then went down the beach to watch an amazing sunrise.

After a quick stop at Starbucks we headed to the Opera House to support their bid to become one of the new 7 world wonders. Expecting crowds of 1000's we got there early... talk about over kill. There were honestly about 30 people there, and 10 were staff. And we call ourselves Australians...

But we went, and we supported.

We waved our flags, danced, yelled a bit and I told Sydney what I thought...

Then I went to work, and then picked Kate and Gordo up from the airport, and then I locked my keys in the car, and then I ate Krispy Kremes, and then I went to connect at the beach, and then I went to bed. Tired. But bigger for the experience.

Taking Time

2006-11-16T06:42:00.000+10:00

So it has taken me a few days to get to the point where I could post about this.

One of the guys at work had an epileptic fit on Tuesday morning. He was a big guy, and was throwing himself around, yelling, foaming at the mouth and hitting his head against a table.

There was only me and another girl my size there, and we couldn't help him, or stop him from hurting himself.

I ran to get a guy to help us, and he calmed him down while we got the ambulance to come and take him to hospital. But it was horrible. To see someone not be able to stop themselves from hurting themselves like that.

He is all fine now, and we all went out to dinner last night, which was great. For some reason I really wanted to see him ok again, as if I wasn't able to believe it when everyone said that he was ok.

I am going to do a first aid course next week. This is the second time in 3 months that something like this has happened, and next time, I want to know what to do.

Mum used to always say that we should carry the contact details of our friends / family with us when we were traveling, and I used to roll my eyes and move on. But this man needed help, and we knew nothing of his medical history, medication or special needs and had no way of contacting anyone. Mum was right. We need to be a little bit more aware.

Life is what it is. And we are here for the time that we are here. And sometimes you just think about that a little more than you normally do. I know where I am going, and I am so glad for that, more than I can say. But what for those who don't??

Fishes...

2006-11-14T06:51:00.000+10:00

There has been a bit of slackness in the camp over the last few weeks, and there hasn't been much running going on. Last Monday I went for a run and nearly killed my self..

Actually, let me digress for a second... I was chatting with Kimbo and Clare last night, and they both said that they don't get heart attack when they run.. but I'm sure it can't just be me.. It's like a stitch, but in your heart. There is like this stabbing pain in your chest area and you feel like your heart is beating double time.. I'm sure it's not just me.. I haven't smoked in ages, and I don't think I could be still suffering the effects.. anyone else get heart attack?? Ever??

Anyway, back to the point. I decided yesterday that I really don't like running much, which is probably why I don't go so much. So I am going to take up swimming again.

I went yesterday afternoon to the ocean pool near my house. It was amazing. I've been swimming in there a few times, but never with goggles on. There is a whole little world under there.. even fishies! (Kimbo, they are small and totally 100% harmless:)

The only problem I found was that without the lines on the bottom of the pool I can't swim in a straight line! Now it doesn't help that there are these crazy waves crashing all over the place and taking you out, or that you are totally distracted by the life under the sea, but who would have thought those lines made any difference???

I was all over the place, swimming into the walls and taking people out.. Who would have thought swimming was a contact sport?

So expect a brown, fit me when you all see me next.. (ok, for those living in Sydney, this might not be the next time you see me, maybe a few more times after that.. but there will definitely be more brown-ness, and more fitness, and hopefully some more coordination...)

A bit of colour...

2006-11-11T21:20:00.000+10:00

Thought I would spice up the blog a little... thought it was looking a little drab..

Just finished watching Happy Gilmore, got to love that movie.. Finally got to hear the rhyme again, the one after he smashes the bottle..

He says, "I just may, lay by the bay, with some clay, what do you say.." or something.. anyone know of any web sites that give you movie quotes??

Yeah I won the ham!

2006-11-10T06:27:00.000+10:00

It all started on Monday when Addy called. Dinner was suggested, and I love that we didn't even have to talk about where we were going to go.. It was obvious, on a Thursday, you go to raffle night at the RSL.

So we did. And I won.

The story does go a little deeper than that. You see when at the pub I generally choose not to wear my glasses, and before this has never caused a problem... unfortunately (for Adam) last night I discovered why glasses are good and should be worn EVERY time one is trying to read something.

We were all sitting around waiting for the numbers to be called, and I was trying to set some atmosphere, some expectancy, a little bit of faith.. So I was already kinda excited. And then it happened, they read Adam's number! First call and bam, we win! Talk about excited.

I screamed. We all did. I waved my arms in the air, looked around at everyone as if to say "that's right, that's my brother, taking home the ham!" so we sent him right down to the stage to claim his prize.

It was only then that Kimbo mentioned that she wasn't sure if it actually was his number...

Turns out that without glasses on a 1 really can look like a 7.. they both have a down stroke and a little funny bit at the top..

These are all excuses. Adam, I'm sorry. So sorry. I know I said that a lot last night, but at least today I can say it without falling apart laughing.

Anyone keen for a ham salad sandwich, you know where I am..

BackBlog

2006-11-09T06:44:00.000+10:00

Thank you Amy for this word that sums up exactly what is going on here. There is soooo much to say and update, every time I think about it it's just a little too much so I post nothing instead.

I've decided to draw a line in the sand and just say nothing about what has been happening. Seems like a good plan to me. As I often wonder who is actually reading this, and really if there is a need to tell the whole story.

I have this theory that creating a blog is actually the worst thing you can do when you move to a new city. There are all these people you leave behind who would normally email you to see how things were going who now just check the blog and get an update. Nothing wrong with that, except most times you have no idea they've done that. Talk about potential for insecurity issues! Lucky for me I'm so arrogant it really is quite difficult for me to be insecure.

I don't really know where I am going with this, but I guess the point is that I miss you too Bron, and I am dying to know how you are enjoying the 'good side' of London, and how the new job is going, and if you are still keeping in touch with Saskia, and when you are going to come and visit Australia... I guess I could email, but at the moment all I do is keep checking your blog and hoping that you are going to one day post the answers to my questions... :-)

Vegas To Syder!

2006-11-05T17:40:00.000+10:00

What a trip!!! It was awesome.

Highlights??? Visiting all the churches and seeing how excited they are to get on board with Backpackers! It's awesome. God is building an army.

Staying in a Motel. Never done that before. It was cool. Left something in the car?? No worries, it's just outside the door about 2 m from where you sleep!! Amazing concept.

And just being on the road. It's was awesome to spend time with the girls, and definately fantastic to have Kimbo here!

Life in Vegas

2006-10-29T15:54:00.000+10:00

So here we are.. back in BrisVegas... It's awesome..

Went to pick Shelley up from the station last night and my first word of advise was take off your jumper. This place is sooo hot already and it's not even Summer..

Kimbo arrives on Tuesday, and we'll start the road trip on Thursday. Many a photo will follow.

Please excuse the dodgy blogging of late. Will get back in the flow soon.

Yay for Oracle!!

2006-10-20T12:35:00.000+10:00

Going to Melbourne on Sunday to visit Pees (and do some training for Oracle)!!! Yay!!

Am going to stay till Thursday, then come back to do washing, and fly to BrisVegas on Saturday!! Yay for travelling!!! Just when you think you are going to scratch your feet off they're so ichy to go somewhere free trips come along!

Excited!!!!

Tears

2006-10-20T07:43:00.000+10:00

When I got home last night Clare told me she was deeply concerned that I was have an affect on her. See, the other night we were watching America's Biggest Looser, (for some reason I have a really I like watching it), but I cry. Most of the way through. I cry all the time now. At ads, cards (esp. if they're Hallmark) and I hate to say it, but even Home and Away.

There was a time when Corinne would cry at everything, and I would point and laugh, but it seems that she had had an effect on me, and now I am affecting Clare, and so the world goes round...

Adam sent me this link. And I cried. Sitting at your desk at 7.30am wiping tears from your eyes is not the sign of a stable woman.. or is it?? maybe we all need to cry more. For the moment, I am going to say that we do. No big theological reasons, just a little self-preservation.

It's all so quiet... shhhh... shhhh...

2006-10-19T07:49:00.000+10:00

Ok, so I win for being the most computer illiterate 'administrator' on earth.

Was thinking it was getting a little quiet out there. Turns out I'd chosen the wrong setting with the comment moderation, and while Amy was trying to warn me, she was doing so in the comments, which I was unable to see. Luckily for me she reverted to ye old telephone contact last night, and this morning I have been able to rectify the situation.

So apologies, I was not intentionally ignoring all of you, just being a little blonde..

I was just so outraged at the post-spam. I mean really. How rude. As if emails weren't enough. And to make it worse they pretend to have read your blog, they start by complimenting you on your post, trying to get in your good books, well count me out. I am sorry to say but I don't like these people. If you're one of them, please refrain from posting your rubbish on my blog. This is MY space, where I get to talk about ME, it's all about ME, not you, ME, ME, ME!! (Maybe Bron is right, maybe Australia is chaging me... :-)

Hullabaloo to end all Hullabaloos..

2006-10-16T21:02:00.000+10:00

Who would have thought that one small post could create such an uproar!

Lesson learnt, no longer will I publicize violent acts on the internet. Although I maintain it was all solicited and therefore in essence not violent, but rather submissive!

I have spent this afternoon / evening on the phone to two amazing friends from London. What a fantastic way to spend the arvo. Got to love it when you can not speak to someone for 6 months, and then just pick up the phone and start right off as if you had never stopped!

Speaking of friends.. am totally excited! Kimbo is coming, and will be here 15 days!!! which means that I got to Brisvegas in 12 days! Which means that I will have my car in Sydney in 20 days! Which means that I will half my trip to church, but more importantly... have some where to sing loudly.

Seriously, flatting with people it's not easy. Where can you sing??? not in the shower, there is too much of an echo, (my singing sounds best when it cannot be heard), not while on your run in the morning (I look crazy enough with the wild hair, let alone the crazy-can't-hardly-breathe-singing) and not while watch idol. I thought the last would be ok, but aparently it's not. So if not here then where??

The answer is in the car, roll down the window, fly down the highway - ok, so in Clemmy (Pees named the car Celmentine in a moment of weakness) in Clemmy it will be more of a roll down the highway and hope for the best.. But Kimbo and I are about to embark on an amazing road trip - my first ever - and I am sooooo excited!

Fight Club

2006-10-11T07:39:00.000+10:00

Ok. So before I start today I want to make a few things clear..

1. I am a nice person.
2. All activities were solicited.
3. I have not changed. Nothing about me is different.

With that said. I smacked my flat mate it the face last night.

I should probably start at the beginning. We were sitting around the other night talking about the things we've always wanted.. Lots of things came up, cars, boys, big big houses, but then when I heard a black eye I thought, this is my chance. I've always wanted to punch someone.

I just wanted to know what it felt like. You know, in all the movies where they totally smack someone out?? I always wondered how that felt. It fitted perfectly.

So last night when I came home from work we decided that tonight was the night. We had our connect group coming over, so we decided to do it after. (Believe it or not we actually read Matthew 5????? Maybe that was a sign and we should have stopped there...)

So after connect we were standing in the kitchen, looking at eachother, wondering if either of us would have the guts to go through with this, but by this stage, we'd dared eachother, and there was no backing out.

I thought we should move onto the carpet. I mean, what if I hit her so hard she fell over and cracked her head?? Then there was a massive discussion on what angle I should go for.. upper cut?? or just smack her straight in the head??? Was this going to damage my hand???? Anyway, as you can tell this went on for a while.

Then I smacked her in the head.

Next thing I know she's on the ground. Laughing her heart out. All she kept asking was "Is that it???""

Now in my defence I've never hit anyone before. And I was nervous. I don't think I can do it properly. I really don't. I don't think I have it in me to hurt someone. Even if she wants me to.

So we were up till about midnight last night with all of these shenanigans, and I still don't think I was over it by the time I went for my run this morning. Everytime I think about it I randomly start laughing. Loud. And repeatedly. So now I'm a crazy-laugh-to-myself-flat-mate-basher. Have I changed that much?

Umm...

2006-10-08T22:48:00.000+10:00

Am watching Super Size Me at the
moment. I have been meaning to watch it for ages. Very scary.
Have you seen the size of the Super Size Fries???

Am going to leave the full rant to Adam, he does it so well. But just wanted to put my word out there. It's scary. And I pray Australia doesn't go down the same road.

I have been reading The Makers Diet, a book which talks about going back to organics. Although I must admit I did sit on the bus the other day reading this book while eating chocolate bullets... It felt wrong...

Reading this book you realise how little food we eat that isn't actually processed. I, like Pees, have been inspired to eat more fruit and fresh veg. But then when you think about it, most of that isn't organic anyway. Look at the tomatoes you can buy at Coles. So if the fresh fruit and veg isn't right anymore.. then what is ok?

A friend of mine went on a diet a while ago where they are no food that contained numbers in the ingredients. It's tough. There's not so much out there anymore. No milk, no cheese, no cereal, no bread, no juice, definitely no lollies, no spreads, nothing. Just fruit and veg (and they get their numbers before they hit the plate).

The photos have no link to this post, and serve no real purpose other than to try and make the page a little less black, and the post a little less depressing. It worked for me.. guess it's kinda easy to put something bright on the packaging to make the contents look better.

Backpackers United

2006-10-04T20:50:00.000+10:00

So this is what has got me hooked and addicted at the moment. I love this vision.

Please check it out.

And feel free to get united.

Sliding Doors

2006-10-01T10:46:00.000+10:00

So this weekend is Hillsong Conference Europe. The first one ever. How totally exciting.

It also marks the intended date of my return to the UK. I had said that I was going to be back to host conference...

"And now I have a word for you who brashly announce, 'Today - at the latest tomorrow - we're off to such and such a city for the year. We're going to make a business and make a lot of money.' You don't know the fist thing about tomorrow.... Instead, make it a habit to say, 'If the Master wills it and we're still alive, we'll do this or that."
1 John 4 msg

And Proverbs 19:21 says "Many are the plans of a man's heart, but its the Lord's will the prevails."

Guess that's it. Still miss London, a lot sometime, definitely miss all my friends there. But this is where I am, and amazing things are going on here. This plan is far better than my original plan. Hurts to say, but it's true.

Someone asked me the other day how my friends felt about the fact that I wasn't coming back. To tell you the truth I had never asked. There wasn't much that any of us could do about it. Most of my friends didn't ask me how I felt about staying in Australia. There was more an underlying understanding that this was outside of the 'plan' and that God was moving things around to suit His plan.

How great to have friends like that. Yeah we miss each other, but what an amazing support! I know that they know that I would have loved to have stayed. And I know that they know that this is the place for me at the moment.

1 Cor 7 : 17
"And don't be wishing you were someplace else, or with someone else, where you are right now is God's place for you. Live, love, obey and believe right there."

It's good sometimes to stop and take a look at where life would be if we would have gone down the different path.. come home an hour earlier to find our husband in bed with someone else! ok, so that was the movie, but you get the point.

Each decision takes us somewhere. Each one is important. But that being said, even if we make the 'wrong' choice we'll still be learning and growing, and that ultimately is what it is all about.

I love the quote that Kimbo has on her myspace "Even if you are on the right track, you'll still get run over if you just sit there!" Awesome. And so true.

Sometimes it's good to just stop and think. I remember one time when we were moving as kids, I must have been about 5 and Dad was in the back of this big truck moving the fridge or something big and heavy. It was in the middle of a Brisbane summer, where it's like 35 degrees and you sweat the moment you step out of bed.. Dad was moving this thing, and then he just stopped, and sat down. I asked him what he was doing, we still had stuff to move. He turned to me and said, sometimes you need to sit and think, and sometimes you just need to sit.

No idea why that comment has stuck with me for so long, but it has. Guess today is a sit and think time... Just sit times are good too. And coming from London, it's been a challenge learning how to do it again. But it's happening, and it's good.

Am going to go down to the beach and go for a swim and just sit for a bit.

Shame..

2006-09-29T07:40:00.000+10:00

I became a member of the Maroubra RSL last night... Is that ok?? I'm only 23.

But I hear it calling all the time.. about every time when I'm on the bus on the way home from work and I start thinking about what I am going to cook for dinner, I hear this voice, just a whisper.. so I follow, and I eat at the RSL instead.. at least once a week at the moment.. last week twice...

There was a live band there last night, and a meat tray raffle.. I mean, who knew that they still did that??!!

I asked one of the guys what the salad was made of, he said he didn't know as he threw the remains of the sloppish white stuff into his trolley and left.. So if they don't know.. how will I ever??? But maybe that's ok, maybe I just need to have a little more faith..

Eyes to see!!!

2006-09-26T17:31:00.000+10:00

Got new glasses, totally have eyes to see now.

Jeremiah 5:21
Hear this, you foolish and senseless people, who have eyes but do not see...

That was me, but no more!

It was amazing, he put the little card in front of me, I looked at it, and read it, just like that. No squinting, no placing it on the floor and taking a step back to see if that would help. There's a whole new world out there baby... all this detail.. who would have thought??

Sprinkles

2006-09-25T19:44:00.000+10:00

Have taken to doing some massive weekend walks lately.. not sure where this has come from.. or why I seem to keep doing it, this photo was taken on last weekends adventure from Manly to the Spit. It was all going well till we found ourselves knee deep in water while popping around the corner to see if we could rejoin the path which had disappeared. Turns out we could, but only after jumping over razor sharp (ok, mildly spiky) rocks which we then had to scale on hands and knees!

We only had one casualty. Poor thing. The knee-deep water suddenly becomes waist high when you slip over.. didn't help that all we could do was ask her to get back in so we could catch it on camera! No major injuries though.

Then this weekend we missioned from Bondi to Maroubra. Talk about a hike. It was good though.. did i mention that it was almost 30 degrees, and through out the whole day we only managed to spot one cloud?? (sorry, can't help myself)

Icecream seems to be becoming a mandatory part of every weekend. Asked mum to bring some Ben and Jerry's back for me... she said no... whatever, it's not like the UK is that far.. they've got freezer bags...

Cheap as mate!

2006-09-12T07:56:00.000+10:00

We discovered the wonder of the Maroubra Seals Club on Sunday night. It's 5 mins walk from my house, and on a Sunday night, they do dinner for $5.50.. beer costs $2.. and there is an all-you-can-eat salad bar (it should be said that you do need to be quite brave to try this one.. we're still trying to distinguish the ingredients..)

But wait, there's more. On Monday to Wednesday dinner only cost $4!! That's right, your heard it, $4. I will cook no more! Seriously though, I was doing some groceries last night (turns out I forgot about a million things in the late night run on Friday - Education tick) and figured that I would cost me more to get the ingredients for dinner than it would to go to the RSL-MATE (Sorry, really having trouble saying RLS without throwing a MAAATE on the end.. )

So I wear my pluggers (flip flops for you non-aussies) ripped jeans, and big hoodie and am totally over dressed! Love it. I'll be there every Monday night if anyone ever wants to come to dinner?? It's awesome hey mate!

Tick List

2006-09-10T17:43:00.000+10:00

Had a great weekend this weekend. You know how sometimes, weekends just seem to hold everything they need to perfectly. Like all the boxes get ticked and there is that fulfilled feeling??

Walked over the bridge (tourism) to Amy's party on Friday night, which I must say was awesome and very well hosted. Came home late and stupidly decided to do my groceries on the way home (essentials). Carrying 10kgs of fruit around at midnight is not a good idea, so lesson learnt (education)..

Saturday got up early and read my book for a bit (relaxation), then went into the city and had a look around the market (shopping) then went to help a friend move house (good deed). Saturday night went to church, which was amazing! (God revelation) and then came home and watched the end of The Sound of Music with the flatties (time wasting, but highly enjoyable relaxation).

This morning did the washing (essentials) and then went for a run (exercise) and went to church in the morning, and then had some meetings for backpackers (serving) then got totally soaked in the rain on the way home (adventure).

Am about to go out for dinner with the flatties (family time) before I call Corinne and Nandi(total highlight) and there you have it. All the bases covered. These, I think, are the required components for a great weekend. You know how sometimes you get so involved in what is happening that you actually forget that you have a job to go to?? and your mind doesn't even go there??! Love that.

What a night

2006-09-07T07:42:00.000+10:00

So last night when I got home we watched the special on 9/11. Amazing, amazing stuff. It was so interesting to listen to how the news was being reported on that day, like "this seems to be an action of a group..." and now, with what happened in London a couple of weeks ago, it's a Terrorist Attack, A Threat, we need to keep Fighting the War on Terror..

We have created a whole new language, a new vocabulary within the last 5 years to describe the horrible things that are happening. We didn't have the words before, and now we do. I think that's scary. I don't want anymore new words like that.

Now I was going to blog today about the crazy storm we had last night. How the lightning was so bright that it made me feel like I'd been looking into the sun when really I was lying there with my eyes closed. It was awesome. But that seems trivial now. Maybe that's how we do it though, how we continue through this time, we distract ourselves, pretend the threat isn't there...

I know that I am secure and I am certain of where I am going. But what of those who don't know yet? Those who are still deciding? I am not meaning to sound fatalistic (although I know I am) but I was just thinking about it. A guy in my office came into work last Monday morning, felt chest pains, and spent the next two days in hospital, and is still going back for more tests this week.

I appreciate the fact that I am healthy, happy, enjoying life. Sometimes I look at just how many good things are happening and I can't believe it. But deep down, things are not right at the moment. There is too much injustice. Sometimes I think we just need to talk about it a little more. Become a little more aware. The head in the sand stuff won't work for long. Eventually we will realise that even if the weather doesn't look like we want it to above the surface, it is better to live with than a mouth full of sand!

Too Far..

2006-09-06T12:55:00.000+10:00

Ok.. So my sideburns are plummeting below my jaw line, and the mullet at the back has begun to curl (ok flip is more accurate) coz it keeps hitting my collar. This is not good. It doesn't look good, and I can't just pass it off as a 'new style' anymore.

So a haircut it is. Found one for $18. Is that a good thing?? At first I was really happy that it was so cheap? But can you get something decent for that price? Maybe I should just pay more and save on hat investments afterwards.. but no, I am going to speak life into this haircut. It is going to be great!

So Tony and Guy, your trainees had better know what they are doing before they are unleashed on my head. Please.. please.. train them well today.

Some cool pics

2006-09-03T19:04:00.000+10:00

There is this awesome site Visited Planet, recomend you check it out...

Full to Overflowing!

2006-09-01T15:23:00.000+10:00

I just got given a laptop!

That's it, free of charge, with a lovely guy who offered to service it for me! Free! Wireless internet, the lot. We just named it Sebastian.

I can't say how excited I am. If I ever had any doubt that prayers were answered then this was the proof! I gave up asking around, and trying to 'suggest' my miracle into place. This was all Him!!!

Yay!! I am so excited. Backpackers watch out.. If you thought I was writting a lot of documents before.. just you wait!

Will post photos of Sebastian soon!!!

More photos as promised..

2006-08-26T11:57:00.000+10:00